


Survival

by fireawy17



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Jealous Rick, Negan (Walking Dead) Being an Asshole, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), Possessive Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Rick, Sexy Negan (Walking Dead), Smut, Sweet Negan (Walking Dead), Violence, rick grimes - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2019-07-18 08:25:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 24,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16114595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireawy17/pseuds/fireawy17
Summary: Negan only has one wife, and she is just as cruel as him... at least she appears so on the surface. When she meets the group from Alexandria, can she convince Negan to abandon his ways, or will it become an all out war?**taking a liberal approach to events in the show**CURRENTLY RE-WORKING!!





	1. Chapter 1

Darkness. That's nothing new in the new world in which we live. There weren't any streetlights, no electricity at all unless you knew a guy who could rig something up. All things considered, it's probably the least thing to be concerned about, but not when there is danger that could be lurking in every shadow. 

"Almost time for me to make my entrance." My husband smirked, running his tongue along his bottom lip. 

"You don't have to make it so theatrical." I smirk, adjusting his scarf in what little light was provided. 

"Oh ho, baby, that is where you are wrong." He pulled me tight against his chest. "I know it makes you all squirmy and ready to go." Before I could protest, he captured my lips in his and kissed me hard. 

"Boss?" A knock came at the door. 

Growling, Negan pulled away and shot Simon a look. "Do you see I'm fucking busy?" 

"Sorry." Simon threw his hands up and turned to leave. 

"Sorry doll, daddy's gotta go to work." Negan smirked and threw Lucille, his pride and joy, over his shoulder. "Wanna see a show?" 

Smiling, I took Negan's hand and walked down the steps of the RV we had been waiting in. This was the typical Negan MO- have Simon intensely build up the tension while whoever Negan was targeting worried about what was about to happen. Then, of course, Negan makes his grand entrance, lays down the law, and carries on. And man, does he look sexy doing it. 

"Well, well, well." Negan smirked as he let go of my hand and walked across the line of people on their knees. It was one of the bigger groups that Simon had caught on the road, and if the intel was correct, there was more of them. "Look what we have here." 

Knowing his role, Simon moved next to me to protect from any possible attacks. Completely unnecessary since Negan had all of the Saviors out here, outmanning the group by at least a hundred.

"So what's the deal?" I whispered to Simon as my husband circled them, like a predator and his prey. It was his favorite game. 

"I don't know, sweetheart." Simon whispered back, crossing his arms. "I think the one with the crazy look in his eye is the leader and the rest are his flunkies, but ya never know."

"Now, just to make sure you understand, I'm gonna have to kill one of ya." Negan smirked. "I don't want to, but," he took a test swing of his bat, "Lucille here, she is a stickler for making sure shits in order."

"No!" One of them screamed. "We understand!" 

Uh oh. I looked to see a woman with long dreads and a pleading look in her eyes swarmed with Saviors, ensuring that she wouldn't move from her kneeling position. 

"Huh." Negan clicked his tongue and looked back at me. "Now, since I am a reasonable type of guy," he began pacing again. "I'm gonna put the fate of one of you sorry shits in the hands of my beautiful wife. Now, don't let that fucking pretty face fool ya, she is a handful!" He bellowed and bent down so he was face to face with the one with the crazy look in his eyes. "And I'm not just talking about in the sac." He winked and motioned for me to come forward. 

"Now, how I do know you REALLY understand what my husband just said?" I crossed my arms over my chest. "I mean, I could say 'oh no, don't kill any of them', and when we come for our shit, it's not ready." I looked between them. "That would make me a liar, now wouldn't it?" 

"Please," the same woman whimpered, looking at me desperately. 

I hated this part. Who was I who decided who lives and who dies? I guess it comes with the territory that I chose. "Yeah, I can't take your word for that." I looked at my husband, who was reveling in my performance. He loved seeing me like this. "But how do we decide which one of you it's going to be?" 

"I have the perfect way." Negan smirked and slung his bat back over his shoulder. "We're going to make this even Steven." He walked toward the group and began to play Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe. To each person, he shoved the bat carelessly at them, bringing it so close to their face that they flinched back. When he was finally stopped, the bat was pointed at a man with bright red hair and mustache. 

"Here we go," I took a deep breath and waited for the sound of the barbed wire ripping the flesh from someone's skull. I knew that sound far too well. 

"Anyone moves, anyone says anything, cut that boys other eye out and feed it to his father." My husbands tone changed to matter of fact. My husband finished his speech and brought the bat down on the mans head. I watched in amazement as the man sat back up and mumbled something." 

"Did you hear that?" Negan laughed and looked over to me. "He just said 'suck my nuts'!" He brought the bat down on his skull again, still laughing. 

After he was finished, he turned his back to walk back toward me so that we could finally go home. He had barely made it three steps when one I hadn't been paying much attention to jumped up and planted his fist squarely on my husbands jaw.

In one quick second, the man was planted on the ground by Saviors, a crossbow against his skull. 

"Nah, you don't kill that." Negan smirked and waved the crossbow away. "He's coming home with us!" He began walking back toward the group. "That shit will NOT fly!" 

I watched as the man was loaded into a van among the caravan of trucks that aligned the perimeter and Negan gave a speech about having to kill another one of them because of what the man did. "I'm getting in the RV." I mumbled at Simon.

He caught me by the arm. "You know that'll piss him off more. Just relax." He whispered back at me. 

I took a deep breath and watched Negan smash in the head of another one of the group. This one appeared to be significantly more painful for them. It took everything I had to suppress the emotions that were threatening to boil over the surface. Negan was doing what he had to do, not just for himself but for me and for everyone back home who were swore to protect.

"Now," my husband stopped, out of breath for taking his aggression toward the man that punched him out on the other mans head. "We'll see you next week." He winked at the ground and handed Lucille off to one of his more trusted Saviors. "Find me some good shit." 

I waited anxiously as my husband made his way over to me and kissed me passionately in front of everyone, inherently showing them that he was unbothered with the situation. "Lets go home." I smiled at him and we made our way into the RV. 

Simon took the wheel as we settled into the back. I looked out the window to see what was left of the group, finally letting what had just happen sink in. I couldn't help but feel sorry for them, knowing I wouldn't be able to cope if that was Negan lying on the ground, his head completely obliterated and its contents strewn across the ground. 

"Hey," a Negan said softly, nudging my face so I was looking at him. "You don't have to do this." 

I gave him a weak smile. "I want to. I want to do what I can to protect what we have." 

"That's my job." He pulled me into his lap so that I was straddling his hips. "Yours is to just look incredibly sexy." 

I laughed and kissed him hard. This was the Negan I knew- protective, loving, and based on the feel of his growing erection under me, increasingly horny. "I hope that's because of me and not what just happened. Because if that was because of what just happened, I think you'd be considered a psycho."

"Of course it's because of you, baby." He planted another passionate kiss on my lips. "Simon, you try to sneak a peak at my wife and I'll cut your dick off and feed it to you." Negan growled as he carried me to the very back of the RV, trying to get as much privacy as possible.

This was my life now. This was the world now. I just had to accept it and do what I could for my husband and I to survive.


	2. Chapter 2

"This world could make good people do bad things. But I don't think that I was ever really a good person. Sure, I hadn't ever broken the law, not even a speeding ticket, or intentionally hurt someone, but I've done some pretty horrible things." I flicked the ashes off the end of my cigarette and took another long drag. 

"Like what?" Simon snickered as he watched two of Negan's flunkies lead two men to the outside border of our home, which was peppered with the undead. "You don't have a bad bone in your body. I've known you for five years, Laila." 

I refused to watch as the men chained the other men onto the gate to keep the walkers entertained. My husbands versions of punishment for breaking the rules were very different than mine. "Remember that girl that worked in the office of Negan's school? Tracey?" 

Simon nodded with a vague understanding. "I've… heard the name mentioned."

"The slut Negan cheated on me with." I mumbled while I exhaled a could of smoke. 

"You know he still feels like shit about that… women around here are throwing themselves at him and-"

"That's not what I'm getting at." I cut him off sharply. "When the shit hit the fan and all of this started, we stumbled across her in the 'safe zone' of the school. She was the last one alive, holed up in a closet." 

Simon nodded slowly, trying to figure out where I was going with the story. 

"Long story short, we were being chased by the biters and I broke her legs so that Negan and I could escape." I threw the cigarette on the ground and squashed it with my boot. "And you have no idea how good it felt to watch her face being ripped apart while she screamed for help." 

"Hey, that's understandable," Simon shrugged. "She deserved it. Besides, you were going to beat the shit out of her anyways." 

I sighed and walked back inside, making my way down the long desolate hallway until I reached Dr. Carson's office. Knocking softly, I let myself inside. "Is it ready?" 

"It is." He sighed and dropped the file he was writing in. "And I'm sorry to say that it is negative again, my dear." He handed me the long, white stick that was the pregnancy test so I could confirm for myself. 

"Guess we're gonna have to try harder then." A familiar gruff voice came from behind me. I turned to see my husband leaning against the doorframe, his signature smirk on his face.

"How'd you know I was in here?" I asked, tossing the stick in the trash. 

"I know everything my dear," he pulled me against his chest and kissed me passionately, obviously trying to make a scene in front of the doctor. 

"Negan." I frowned as a pulled away. "We should go upstairs." 

"Okay," he ran his tongue along his lower lip, knowing how that always makes the heat pool in my belly. I sighed and started to ascend the nearby stairs that lead to our private top floor apartment. "You were thinking about her again, weren't you?" He sighed as he followed me. "You can't keep doing that to yourself."

"No offense honey," I opened the door to our apartment and walked in, not waiting for him. "But you don't understand at all. I was still in complete shock that you did what you did. And then to kill someone… to kill someone and feel nothing but satisfaction…" I shook my head and plopped down on the couch. 

"Hey, I've killed people and enjoyed it." He sat down on the couch across from me and kicked his feet up. "Only people that deserve it, of course." 

I sighed. He wasn't capable of understanding and I can't expect him to. "That's not what I wanted to talk to you about anyways." 

"Go ahead baby, I'm all ears," he raised his eyebrows, honestly curious as to what I have to say.

"I think that group from the other night is going to cause us problems. Call it women's intuition or whatever, but I can feel it." I ran a hand over my exhausted face. I hadn't been sleeping well lately, and my husbands antics weren't helping. 

"Babe, we've outnumbered them by the hundreds. What makes you think that WE have anything to worry about?" I sat up, putting his elbows on his knees. 

"It was the look they had in their eyes. Every single one of them, including the kid." I tried to suppress the image of their faces while they waited to learn which one of them was going to die. "It was something… ferule." 

Negan pondered this for a second and nodded. "I get it. But you know I'm not gonna stop doing every fucking thing I can to protect you." 

"And those people downstairs." I added. Slowly, I got up and walked over to my husband, who pulled me into his lap. 

"Everyone comes second to you, doll." He grumbled in a low voice. "Even before all of this. Remember when you brought me home to meet the family the Christmas before all this?" 

I laughed and nodded. "My dad almost shot you because he thought you were some old perv grooming his daughter or something." 

Negan smiled and shrugged. "Hey, who was into turn down a hot, drunk coed who was whispering dirty dirty things into my ear?" 

I smiled and ran my hands down his chest to the various belts he wore. "Like how bad I want that giant, throbbing cock in my mouth?" I whispered lowly. 

Negan groaned and smirked, watching me undo his pants slowly. Negan was about twenty years my senior, but he was still the best I've ever had in bed… not that that list was very long. 

When I finally pulled his pants and boxers down just enough, his cock sprang free, causing me to inadvertently lick my lips. Teasingly, I ran my tongue from the base of his enormous member all the way up to the head, eliciting another moan from him. Before I could do anything else, a knock came at the door.

"Negan? Laila?" It was Dwight. "We've got an issue."

Growing theatrically, Negan got up and tucked himself back into his pants. "Dwighty boy if this is not a life or death situation, you are going to be in a life or death situation." 

"Sir," Dwight huffed as the door flew open. He was panting as if he had run from across the camp. "He's gone… I don't know how he fucking did it, but he escaped."


	3. Chapter 3

"He can't be far." I quipped as I ran down the stairs after my husband. "Someone would have seen him if he made it to the fence." 

"You put too much faith in these fucking idiots." My husband called behind his shoulder. "I want you to go back upstairs." 

"Yeah, fuck that." I pushed passed him and ran down the hall. One of the advantages in being younger than my husband was the physical advantages. 

"Laila!" He called after me as I rounded the corner and out of his line of vision. The only thing I could think about was the people downstairs. We didn't know what this man was capable of and for all intents and purposes, everyone was in danger. 

I heard Negan call my name followed by a string of expletives. Before I had time to respond or even slow down, strong hands grabbed me from the side and shoved me into the wall. 

"You scream and I'll slit ya throat." It was the man Negan had taken from the group in the field. I nodded in compliance, my heart racing from the blade of a knife sticking into my throat. I felt a trickle of blood from where the knife was. 

"What the fuck do we have here?" I heard my husbands booming voice as he rounded the corner at a slow walk, his hands in his pockets. 

"Don't come any closer." The man spun me around so that I was in between him and Negan, the knife still against my throat. I saw the cool calmness in my husbands eyes and tried to calm myself for what was about to happen. One of us was about to die and I couldn't say that I was positive it wasn't going to be me. 

"Whoa, big guy." Negan smirked and put his hands up and stopped walking. "No need to hurt the lady. Its me you want, isn't it? Since I smashed the skull of your friends? It took me days to get all that shit off Lucille!" 

While he was talking, trying to distract the man, I kicked my leg backwards, squarely into his groin and twisted the arm that was holding the knife against my throat. When the man dropped it, I kicked the knife away and slammed him into the wall. 

"That's my girl!" Negan bellowed as fellow Saviors came rushing to my defense. 

"Boss?" One of the many nameless men who worked for us asked, waiting for instruction for what to do with the man. "Should we kill him?"

My husband smirked. "Nah, load him up. We're going for a little ride."

………….

"Can I ask you a question?" Simon asked as we followed the truck Negan was driving. I always hated driving with my husband. Between the road rage and all around bad driving, I thought it better to drive with someone more…. calm.

"I'm sure you're going to anyways." I looked out of the window at the dots of undead that lined the road between the various abandoned cars. 

"What's that song he's always whistling?" He asked, ignoring my sarcastic reply. 

"It's 'Faithfully' by Journey. It was our wedding song." I fought back the wave of longing for a simpler time. Negan and I were different people then. I tried not to think about those times. What was the point? There wasn't any going back to them. 

"I thought you guys didn't have a wedding though? I thought it was a Elvis drive through kind of thing?" He never took his eyes off the road, which was a good thing because Negan's truck screeched to a halt. We were at our destination. 

"We didn't. It was just the song that came on the radio after." I mumbled as I hopped out of the truck. I nodded to my husband as he walked up to the large gate that guarded the mans group. It was showtime. 

"Dun dun dun dun." My husband shot me a wink. Banging Lucille against the gate, he bellowed something I sure he had been thinking of the entire drive over here, "Little pig, little pig! Let me in!"

A man I didn't recognize from the original group approached the gate. "And who might you be?" He asked, looking at Negan and then just beyond him to me. "And with who do I have the pleasure?" He shot me one of those douchebag smiles. 

"Oh you better be joking!" Negan smirked. "I KNOW I made a pretty strong first impression. Even if I didn't, to flirt with a mans wife right in front of him? Ya got some balls kid." 

"You said a week!" The man with the crazy eyes came rushing toward the gate, opening it without hesitation.

"I missed ya," Negan smirked. 

"We don't have anything…" the man looked at me pleadingly. "We haven't been able to-"

"Hey! Eyes up here!" Negan snapped at the man to draw his attention away from me. "She's not gonna fucking go all soft for those baby blues."

"Arat." I crossed my arms over my chest. "Why don't you take Joey and Paul and go see where they're hiding the good shit." 

My husband smirked at me and ran his tongue along his lower lip. "See, Rick, that is the type of girl ya gotta get! She's got some beach ball sized lady nuts, lemme tell you. Doll, why don't you let him know how you beat the SHIT out of his little buddy here?" He motioned at the man who attacked me in the hall. 

I rolled my eyes and made my way down the long road inside the gates. The place was magnificent. Houses aligned the road, kids were playing in the streets until parents saw us and dragged them onto porches. It was an actual community. There was nothing here that Negan wanted and nothing that the Sanctuary needed, this was just a sign of force to ensure the group was falling in line. 

"Hey." I approached a heavy set girl, who looked like she was trying to escape out of sight before I could see her. Stopping heavily, she didn't turn around as I approached her. "Hey, calm down. I'm not going to hurt you." 

The woman turned around slowly but kept her eyes on the ground. I could see that she was holding a young toddler in her arms, who looked like she was better taken care of than most people in the entire community.

"Hey there." I smiled at the little girl, who smiled in response. "May I?" The woman flinched slightly, hesitating. "I won't hurt her." Once she heard the sincerity in my voice, she handed the child over. "Aren't you a beauty?" 

"Whatcha got there, doll?" My husband called, a little further down the road. I turned to see him walking toward me, one arm slung around the crazy eyed mans shoulders, Lucille slung lazily over his own shoulder.

"No…. No…" the crazy eyed man cried.

"Relax, Rick, we're not takin' your kid. Unless you want." He shot me a wink as he smiled at the little girl. 

I smiled as the little girl played with my long hair, giving it a little tug. "Why don't we just focus on what we came here for?" I walked over to the nearest house and sat on the steps. While my husband carted Rick around his own community, I sat there with the little girl, observing the giant disturbance we were causing.

"You're lucky, ya know." I looked at the little girl. "You're too young to have to deal with all this." The little girl giggled in response and snuggled into my shoulder. This, to me, was one of the biggest tragedies of the apocalypse. There was no IVF to help us, no adoption agencies to go to. If we couldn't have kids, that would be the fate we were destined to have. 

I sat with the little girl for what felt like hours, until she had fallen asleep on my shoulder. Once I saw the Saviors and Negan walking toward the gate, I gently handed the sleeping girl to the woman I took her from originally, who was hovering nearby. "Take care of her, yeah?" The woman nodded in response, mouthing a silent 'thank you' to me. 

"See you next week, prick." He called to Rick as we walked toward the gate and our caravan of cars and trucks. "And as for you, pencil dick," he shoved Lucille at the man who had attempted to flirt with me at the gate. "You fucking look at her again and I will not hesitate to smash your god damn skull in like I did your friends." 

As we walked toward our cars, Negan made sure to grab my ass, showing the man he was serious. "You're riding back with me, doll." I sighed, but didn't put up a fight. Once we were on the road, Negan looked over at me. "We're going to have one." He took my hand that was resting in my lap. 

"I know." I smiled at my husband. We had been trying since before the world went to shit. "I know." 

"If worse comes to worse, we'll just fucking take one," he smirked at me and shifted gears of the old mustang he was driving. He always had to be flashy, even in the apocalypse. 

"I'm not just taking someone's child, Neg." I sighed and looked out of the window. "You can't just take whatever you fucking want."

"Relax, doll, I was kidding." He sighed and kept his eyes on the road so we didn't run into the back of the vehicle in front of us. "We're going to have a baby, Lay. I promise. I love you."

I smiled over at him. No matter how many times he's said it throughout the years, even after I found out about his infidelity, he always said it like he meant it. "I know, Neg. I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you guys think!


	4. Chapter 4

“Hey Lay,” Simon knocked softly on Negan and my door, which was slightly ajar. “Negan’s looking for you. He’s on the roof.” 

“The roof?” I questioned, placing a bookmark in the book I was reading. “Why is he up there this late?”

Simon shrugged and walked off in the same direction from which he came. No one around here questioned Negan except for me, no one else had the right to. Negan and I built this place, we run this place, and for everything we do to protect it, no one got to question our methods. But it was annoying as all hell to never get any answers from anyone but my husband. 

Sighing, I got to my feet and climbed the narrow stairway that led to the roof. No one had access to it except for select, very highly regarded Saviors, and Negan and I.  
“There she is.” I heard Negan’s smug voice before I even saw him. 

“Why did you need me all the way up here?” I questioned, clicking the door shut. I turned around to face him and we greeted with a white cloth covered table adorned with wild flowers, which he knew were my favorite, and candles. 

“You don’t think I would forget our anniversary, did you?” he feigned being hurt and walked over to take my hand. “Plus I wanted to get into those tight little pants of your tonight, figured this would help.” He ran his tongue over his bottom lip. 

“Goof.” I mumbled as he wrapped his arms around me. Smiling, I placed my head against his chest and shut my eyes, listening to the beating of his heart. For at least a moment, everything was okay with the world. “I love this.”

“Fuckin’ better. Took me all afternoon.” He mumbled into my hair. He was at least a foot and a half taller than me, but it seemed like I fit into his arms perfectly.

“No… this.” I tightened my arms around him for a moment and sighed. He was still my Negan, no matter how much of a show he put on for everyone else. 

“Well, doll, you’re the only one that gets this.” he kissed my head and pulled away, leading me to the adorned table. I smiled softly as he poured me a glass of wine to match his own and slid into the adjacent chair. “I know things have been crazy lately… I know I haven’t been myself.”

I took his hand across the table. “Neg… baby, stop. We have to protect this place, those people downstairs… all of it.” 

He sighed and ran his hands down his face. “I know, I just want you to know that you’re my priority.” 

I smiled and ran my hand down his jaw softly, feeling his salt and pepper stubble rub my hand. “I love you. I love that I still get this side of you.”

Truthfully, I never saw his romantic side that often before the apocalypse. That is, until I caught him in our bed with that slut. Ever since then, he was going out of his way to do the most romantic things for me in hopes I would forgive him. 

“I love you.” He kissed my palms gently. “I’ve almost lost you once before all of this shit happened. I’m not losing you again.” 

“You won’t.” I smiled. “I’m never going anywhere.” I got up and walked around the table to sit in his lap. I felt his strong arms wrap around me and I relaxed into them. 

“I think you’re right about these assholes causing us problems.” He mumbled into my hair after a while. “But that’s a story for tomorrow. Tonight…” he stood me up and rose himself. With a click of a remote, “Faithfully” by Journey came on a small radio on the side of the table. “Happy anniversary, doll.”

He pulled me flush against him and began to dance slowly to our wedding song, the one Negan always walks around humming. “Happy anniversary, my love.”


	5. Chapter 5

"You know there's a rumor swirling around about Negan." My best friend, Sherry, mentioned as we strolled along the border fence.

"There's always a rumor going around about Negan." I huffed as I rattled the fence, trying to get the undeads attention away from the still alive person Negan had damned to be chained amongst them. 

"No, I mean… I don't know why I'm trying to be coy." She sighed and crossed her arms protectively over her chest. "It's not a rumor." 

"What are you talking about?" I refused to look at her. I knew she was going to be confirming my suspicions about my husband that I hadn't wanted to admit. 

"He's… come on to me, Leila." I met her desperate eyes. "He's told me he would take care of me if I… returned the favor." 

I nodded and started to walk again, this time not waiting for Sherry to match my pace. I was beginning to relive the beginning days of the outbreak again. I was picturing that sluts face who I foolishly believed was the only one. Ignoring Sherry's calls of my name, I climbed the steps up to the apartment I had been sharing with my husband. . 

As I approached the door, I heard a feminine giggle coming from inside. Throwing open the door, I found Negan underneath a blonde figure in his lap. 

"Shit!" Negan grunted and pushed the blonde figure onto the floor. I could now see the face of the woman. She was another one of the Saviors wives who had always been a little too friendly with Negan. 

"You son of a bitch." I managed to get out through my clenched teeth. I wanted to murder her. I wanted to slit her throats and watch her bleed. But this was ultimately my husbands fault. No matter how many girls came on to him, he could have remained faithful. If he had wanted to.

"Baby, please." Negan pleaded, tucking his exposed member back into his pants as he got up to reach for me. 

"I was stupid to believe you could have ever been faithful." I cried as I turned and ran down the steps. Fighting back the tears with all of my might, I ran to the gate and motioned for them to open up. One of the perks of being the queen around here was that no one questioned me. 

I needed to get away. I had to be away from Negan, from this place… from this life. Negan's calls were getting closer and more desperate as I escaped from the gate and into the surrounding woods. I didn't need a Negan to take care of me. I didn't need this place to provide safety or comfort. I could take care of myself. 

Dusk was setting in as I slowed my pace, finally believing that I was a safe distance from the Sanctuary. There was no way Negan's men would find me this deep in the woods at night. The only thing I had to worry about was the undead creeping up on me in the pitch black. 

As if on cue, a branch snapped behind me, causing me to whip around, subsequently snapping my ankle as my foot slipped into a small hole next to where I had been standing. I immediately collapsed on my ground with a gasp of pain forgetting the possible threat behind me. 

"Ya armed?" A grunt came from the direction of the branch snap. 

"Nope. So if you're going to kill me do it quick." I grunted back, pulling my broken ankle out from under my body. 

"I ain't gon kill ya." The voice grunted back. The owner had come into my line of vision and I recognized him as the leader of the group we had met in the quarry all of those nights ago. 

"Sorry to disappoint." I mumbled, leaning against a tree to try to regain balance. 

"Ya ain't gon walk on that." The man nodded his head at my ankle. "Why ya out here alone?" 

I laughed a humorless laugh. "Because my husband is a self centered, egotistical, overall douchebag. But I think you already knew that." 

The man nodded and ran a hand through his short brown hair. "Yeah I think that's fair." He made his way over to me slowly, as if he was approaching a wounded animal. "I can't leave ya here." 

I shrugged. "You can. My bloods not on your hands." 

He sighed, taking a knee in front of me. "I can take you back to my community, get you fixed up. If anything it can give you space to get a clear head?" 

I smirked. "You're not worried I'm going to report back to Negan or sabotage your little farm?" 

"Have you given me a reason to?" He asked, effortlessly scooping me up.

"I figured I was guilty by association." I signed. Maybe I was. I mean, I've done some pretty horrible stuff in the time since the world ended.

The man shrugged as he approached the gate to his community. I recognized it from the day Negan and I visited. "Don't give me a reason to think like that. I'm Rick by the way." 

The gates opened and he carried me inside the walls, gently setting me down on the steps of the house where I remembered their doctor lived. "Leila." 

"So, I gotta know." He leaned against the railing and looked down on me. The doctors porch light came on and Rick motioned for them to come out. "What did he do that was so bad he sacrificed a beautiful girl like you?"


	6. Chapter 6

It had been a sleepless night behind the walls of Alexandria. I wasn't sure if I couldn't sleep because I was worried about my life behind these enemy walls or if I was upset about what Negan did. I finally came to the decision that it was neither; I didn't care if I died and it was my own stupid fault for believing Negan would just change and be faithful to me. 

"No one knows you're here except for the doctor, and she'll keep her mouth shut." The familiar southern drawl stated from the doorway. I had been laying on the couch in Rick's house, which was empty except for himself and his kids. 

I shrugged. "Not like it really matters anyways, right?"

He raised his eyebrows and walked over to the couch. "What do you mean?" Before I could respond, a loud bang outside caught our attention. "Wait here." He ordered as he ran out of the room.

After I heard the door slam, I feebly hobbled my way over to the window. Ricks house was closest to the noise, which was apparently coming from the front gate. A small group of people assembled around, ready to fend off possible invaders. 

"Rick the prick!" I heard a familiar voice bellow. It was loud and clear, even through the pained glass. "You haven't by chance seen my beautiful wife, have you?" 

Shit. 

"Of course I've seen her," Rick grumbled back. "She ordered you to kill one of my people." 

"She's a keeper right?" Negan shot him a wink and slapped him on the back. "Why don't you go get her and I won't bash your head in, huh?" 

"She's not here." Rick spat back. Consciously or not, his hand went to the empty holster on his hip, only to drop in defeat when it did not meet the cold metal. 

My husband leaned back and considered this for a second. "See, Rick, I wanna believe you. I really do…. But I just CANT."

"What makes you think we'd even let her in?" The black woman, the one I recognized as the woman who pleaded for their friends lives in the quarry asked, crossing her arms. 

"Well, Rick has a thing for the whole damsel in distress thing. And she can be pret-ty convincing." Negan shot a wink in Ricks direction. "Simon, why don't you go take a glance in Ricks house?" 

"Why?" Rick asked indignantly. 

"Who are you to be asking ME questions?" Negan barked and closed the distance between them. The color rose into Rick's face, but he didn't respond. Negan took this as a sign of subservience and smirked. "Get my fucking wife."

"What are you doing, Leila?" Simons voice questioned from the doorway. I hadn't even heard anyone enter Rick's house, I was too enthralled in their conversation like a nosy neighbor. "What's going on?"

"Why don't you ask Amber?" I huffed. 

"He did it again, didn't he?" Simon shook his head. "I'm sorry. I really am." 

I shrugged off his apology. "Don't apologize for him. He doesn't deserve it." Struggling, I rose to my feet and grabbed the crutches resting near the sofa. "Lead the way."

Sighing, Simon held the door open for me and gently helped me down the front pour her steps. "Got her, boss." Simon called as I limped along next to him. 

"What the fuck did you do to her?" Negan growled and grabbed Rick by the shirt. "I'm going to fucking kill every last one of you sorry shits." 

"Fucking stop." I growled and hit Negan with a crutch. He let Rick go and turned his full attention to me. 

"Baby, what happened? Are you okay?" He gently took me in his arms and planted a kiss on my head. 

I didn't return the gesture. My only reaction was to look over at Rick, who sympathetically met my gaze. "Let's just fucking go." I grumbled as I began to walk toward the gate. The last place I wanted to be was anywhere close to Negan or that room. I most definitely didn't want to see Amber again. But I also didn’t want Negan hurting any more of these people and I knew he would if he had to. 

"Can we fucking talk, doll?" He asked after helping me into the truck and climbing in himself. "I mean, shit. You just ran out. And how the fuck did you even get here?" 

"Ask Amber, she seems to be your newest piece of ass." I huffed and looked out the window at the passing trees. "it's my own stupid fault for believing in you."

"That's not fucking fair." Negan slammed on the breaks, causing me to put pressure on my already swollen ankle. "Fuck, I'm sorry. Look at me." He motioned my chin toward him, alleviating me of my ability to make a choice in the matter. "I love you with all of my fucking heart. And I will make this up to you." 

"Yeah, that's what you said last time." I refused to meet his eyes. "And don't even tell me she's the only one, Negan. I've had my suspicions for a while." 

He let go of my chin, defeated. "Just tell me what to do, Laila. Please." 

I thought of beating in Ambers skull. To watch her beg for mercy as I let her suffer the agonies before putting her out of her misery, but she wasn't the only one at fault here. The main culprit was my husband. "The only thing you can do is something I don't think you're capable of." I let out a humorless laugh. I finally met his eyes. As I suspected, those chocolate eyes were wide and pleading. 

"Baby anything… please." He took my hands in his and placed gentle kisses over them. 

I resisted the urge to yank them away, knowing that would anger him and that someone would die tonight because of it. "The only thing I've asked of you since before the world went to shit, Negan. Stay faithful."


	7. Chapter 7

The next few days went out in monotonous fashion. Negan insisted that I went everywhere with him and he barely left my side long enough that I could use the bathroom alone. Mentally, he was giving me the space he knew I needed from him, but physically he was like an annoying cough that won't go away.

"Laila…" Amber, the woman I had caught my husband with, widened her eyes as I hobbled into Doctor Carsons office. 

"Save it." I snapped as Negan gently lifted me onto the exam table. I watch him attentively. He carefully avoided standing next to Amber or even making eye contact with her. 

"Doc, you better make sure my beautiful angel gets patched up ASAP." He placed a kiss on my forehead as he turned his attentions to the doctor.

"How are you feeling, Laila?" Doctor Carson asked as he carefully rolled up my pants leg to examine my ankle. The swelling had gone down some, but it was an ugly shade of black and blue. 

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to, doc." I mumbled through clenched teeth. I knew the doctor was being as gentle as he good, but it still hurt like a bitch at the smallest touch. 

"Negan…" Amber said in almost a whisper. "Can I talk to Laila?" 

"Get the fuck out before I chain you to the fence!" Negan snapped, slamming his fist down on the table he was standing next to. Amber said nothing in response and instead left the room. 

"I hate to say this, Laila, but you're going to need to stay off of it completely until it's healed. No runs, no helping the workers, just relax and take it easy." Doctor Carson said as he rolled my pants leg back down. "It should be fully healed in maybe three more weeks."

I sighed and nodded, easing myself off the exam table. "Thanks doc, I'll be back next week." He nodded his response and busied himself with something on the other side of the room. 

"Come here, baby." Negan attempted to grab me as I hobbled out of the room, the sound of my crutches echoing down the empty hall. 

"Don't touch me." I snapped. "You lost that right." 

"Laila, I know you're pissed off. You've got every fucking right to be… but I'm fucking sorry." Negan sighed, running a hand along his scruffy face. "I don't know how I can prove it." 

"That ships fucking sailed, Negan." I laughed humorlessly and continued my slow pace down the hall. "You're 'one time thing, I'll do anything' excuse was used up before the world went to shit." 

"So what, Lay, our marriage is done?" He leaned against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. "Or do you want to fucking forgive me like adults?"

"I have things to do, Negan." I glanced behind me at him. 

In an instant he was in front of me, his hands holding the sides of my face to meet his pleading eyes. Before I could protest, his lips were on mine, enfolding them in a passionate kiss. In that moment, nothing mattered. All I could think about was Negan, his smell, his taste, and my overwhelming love for him. 

Negan let out a small moan as I pulled away from the kiss, my sense finally returning. "I love you so fucking much, doll." 

"I want Amber on the fence." I nodded my head at him. "And if you ever cross me again, you'll be right out there with them. If you think I'm wrong, think about who those people respect more and who those Saviors listen to more." 

Negan widened his eyes but didn't reply. 

"Let me know when they're taking her out there." I turned and made my way toward the door that lead to the factory's floor. "I want to watch."


	8. Chapter 8

“Are you sure you want to do this baby?” Negan asked as we approached the double doors that led out to the yard of the Sanctuary. 

“Maybe you should be more concerned about other things aside from your side piece of ass.” I mumbled as two of Negan’s men opened the double doors for him and I.

“She’s not the one I’m worried about.” He mumbled. I noticed he crossed his arms and stood next to me, an inherent sign of solidarity instead of a giving up of power. If he wanted to keep the façade going, that was up to him. Everyone was going to know who runs the show today. 

I looked down to the crowd of people that stood there, all of them residents of the community my husband and I built together. Standing alone at the edge of the crowd was Amber, two Saviors close by. I noticed with a slight satisfaction that one of them was her husband, who kept shooting hateful looks at her. She had no idea just what was about to happen to her.

“I just want you all to know that what I am doing is a necessity!” I bellowed to the crowd below the platform I stood on. “When you try to overtake someone who has fed you, clothed you, and kept your family safe, well, you’re not worthy of a place in this community.” I was answered with a chorus of agreement. “I want each and every one of you to remember this, just in case you ever decide that you would be better at this job than we are.”

I nodded to the two Saviors flanking Amber, who didn’t hesitate in grabbing her small frame and dragging her, kicking and screaming, to the fence. 

“What is happening?” she cried desperately as the gate was opened. “Please Laila!” 

I crossed my arms and smirked as the two men attached a chain around her ankle and threw her into the undead filled area. “And just remember,” I whispered to my husband as we watch the scene unfold. “You ever fucking cross me again and you’ll be right out there with her.”

After a few moments of watching one of the most hated woman in the sanctuary fight off the undead, the crowd became bored and dispersed. 

“Do you fucking realize how much I love you?” Negan asked, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind. “You can do whatever the fuck you want as long as you keep me by your side.”

“Good.” I said, spinning around slowly on my bad ankle. “Then we’re going to Alexandria tomorrow and taking Daryl home. He’s not your prisoner anymore.”  
Negan raised his eyebrows. “Any particular reason?”

“Because the Alexandrians haven’t given us a reason not to trust them. And until they do, we’re not torturing them.” I looked into my husband’s deep, brown eyes. There was a time I became lost in them, overtaken with how much love I had for him. Now there was a wall around all of the emotion. Instead, now the only thing I felt now was numb. 

“Okay.” Negan nodded and placed a kiss on my forehead. “But the second they fuck with us they’re getting another meeting with Lucille.”

“If and when that decision needs to be made,” I backed up out of his arms and made my way to the door. “I’ll make it.”  
……..  
“So now that you enacted your revenge, do I at least get to come back to bed?” Negan leaned against the doorframe of our apartment. He had been banned to an adjacent room since I had been forced to come back here. I couldn’t decide if I missed him or the powerful tool he had between his legs. It was moments like these that I missed my vibrator.

“I guess you can come back.” I mumbled, scooting over to make room for him. 

“You mean what you said out there?” He asked, approaching the bed slowly, rubbing his hands together. “About chaining me to the fence?”

“Yeah. I did.” I refused to make eye contact with him and instead went about my usual bedtime routine of applying lotion to my body. I knew seeing me do this drove him insane, but I didn’t acknowledge the hungry look he had in his eyes. 

“Well how about,” he knelt down on the bed and slowly made his way over to me. “I make myself more useful.” He grabbed my legs and drug me down onto my back in one fluid motion. 

I sighed, but did not stop him. Even if I was struggling to maintain my love for my husband after his unfaithfulness, I wasn’t going to turn down a chance to get off.

“Did that prick touch you?” Negan asked as he placed kisses along the inside of my thighs as he slid off my pajama pants.

“Rick? No.” I mumbled, trying to ignore his voice. 

“Fucking right, you know who you belong to.” In an instant, his mouth was on the sensitive bud in between my legs, sucking and nipping mercilessly. I couldn’t help the moan that escaped from my lips. He was too damn good at this. He continued his assault on my clit and began to pump two fingers in and out of me. 

“Fuck!” I growled and began to clench around his fingers. I was already close to the edge and he was unrelenting in his assault. 

“That’s right baby,” Negan breathed as he quickened his pace. “Cum for me.”

With a gasp I was thrown over the edge and into euphoria. 

“God damn. So fucking beautiful when you cum for me.” He growled as he pulled off his boxers. 

“Mmmhmm.” I mumbled, crawling under the covers. “Night Negan.”

“What?!” he growled. I smirked at the confused look on his face as he stroked his rock hard member. There was nothing more that I wanted than to have it in my mouth and between my legs, but he had to learn a lesson. 

“You had to learn a lesson. Maybe not in the same way Amber did, but in your own way nonetheless.” I clicked off the light and made myself comfortable. “Now are you coming to bed or are you going to be in the bathroom for a little while?”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! So this is kind of a filler chapter while I write the next one which will hopefully be published soon. Sorry it's been so long!

Before.... 

“Laila you are DRUNK!” Sherry squeeled as we made our way to the dance floor. We were in some tiny neighborhood bar to celebrate the end of midterms and the impending spring break. 

“So are you!” I squeeled and took her hand. I was always more outgoing than Sherry and always had to push her to have some fun. Finally a slower song came on and we slowed down to catch our breath. 

“That guy has been staring at you for like ever.” She giggled in my ear as we danced among other college students celebrating their freedom. I glanced over at the bar to see an older guy sipping what looked like whiskey and smirking at me. From where I stood, he was sexy as hell but I didn’t know if that was the alcohol or not. 

“I know.” I mumbled back at Sherry and shot him a small smile. 

This time, it was Sherry’s turn to push me, literally. Before I could catch my balance, I stumbled off of the dance floor and right into Mr. Handsome’s lap. 

“Oh!” I mumbled as he caught me before I completely fell onto the floor. “I’m so sorry!” 

“S’alright doll.” He smirked but made no motion to help me out of his lap. “I’m Negan.” 

“And I’m drunk.” I replied, looking into his chocolate eyes. “I.... I mean I’m Laila.” 

He ran his free hand over the scruff on his chin but never looked away from me. “You wanna get out of here?” His tone was cool and cocky, like he was a man who knew how to get what he wanted. 

I glanced over at Sherry who had herself stumbled into the arms of some guy I recognized from our English class. “Uh... you’re not going to like kill me are you?” 

He let out a booming laugh as he got up from his seat. “No doll, I ain’t gonna kill ya.” 

“Then... okay.” I slurred as he lead me out of the bar. 

We walked across the parking lot to a shiny black motorcycle parked right by Sherry’s car.

“You afraid?” Negan smirked as he handed me the helmet resting on the handlebars. When I didn’t answer he pulled me flush against him. “I ain’t gonna let nothing happen to you baby.” 

Unthinkingly, I grabbed his white tee shirt and pulled him down to my level. Realizing where this was going, he captured my lips in his and kissed me deeply. When I didn’t pull away, his hands found my ass and pulled me impossibly closer. 

“Then let’s go.” I mumbled against his lips breathlessly. Without hesitation, I slid the helmet on and he helped me onto the back of the bike. Either unintentionally or subliminally, when I wrapped my arms around his waist they met the rock hard bulge in his pants. 

“Hold on baby.” He growled and peeled out of the parking lot. About five minutes later, I followed Negan into an empty elevator in a big apartment building just outside of town. 

“You usually leave bars with strange men?” He smirked as he closed the distance between us, effectively pinning me to the elevator wall. 

“Not usually.” I smirked back. “But I make acceptions.” Before he could retort, the elevators opened and I followed him out and down the hall. 

“You sure about this doll?” He asked once more as he opened the door to his apartment. 

“You keep asking like you’re the one having second thoughts.” I grumbled as we walked inside. In one swift motion, Negan kicked the door closed and threw me over his shoulder. “Negan!” I gasped, trying to not get motion sick from the movement mixed with the alcohol. 

Negan chuckled as he tossed me onto his bed. “Fuckin fire cracker.” 

My head was spinning from the multiple jolts it had just received but I could faintly make out his figure making his way toward me. “I think I’m gonna...” 

“Shit!” Before I could finish my sentence, Negan gently grabbed me and carried me into the bathroom. “Go ahead.” He sighed and held my hair as everything I had consumed in the last four hours came up and into the toilet. “Get it all out doll.” He plopped down on the side of the tub and rubbed my back. 

“Sorry.” I looked up at him pitifully. “I’ll call an Uber.” 

“The fuck you will.” He got up from the tub and helped me to my feet. “Is not gonna send you out for some perv to try to take advantage of you.” I smiled as he shot me a wink. “You can stay here tonight.” 

“I... wow. That’s sweet.” 

“Bet ya I taste like sugar to.” He smirked and carried me back to the previous room. “But you can find that out later.” 

“Where are you going?” I whined as he walked toward the door. 

“Relax doll. Just gonna go get you a gator aide. Be back in a flash.” He ran his tongue along his lower lip and disappeared through the door. 

Fuck. Why did I drink so much?

.......... 

The next morning I woke up in a complete haze. The unfamiliar room was spinning as I slowly sat up. Where was I? When I finally found my footing, I realized that I wasn’t wearing the same clothes as last night. Instead, I was wearing a plain white shirt that went down almost to my knees. 

“There she is!” The guy, who I assumed inhabited the place I was in, bellowed as I made my way down the hall and into the kitchen. 

What was his name? Nathan? Neil? Negan! “Yeah.” I smiled and slid into a chair attached to the kitchen island. 

“Before you ask, nothing happened. After you barfed your ass knocked out.” He smirked as he slid a plate filled with extra greasy bacon in front of me. 

Suddenly, the events of last night came raging back to me, causing my face to heat up. “I am sooo sorry.” 

“No worries, baby. You can make it up to me.” He winked and leaned back against the adjacent counter. I didn’t hesitate to let me eyes wander down his naked chest. He was pretty hot for an older guy. “Maybe sooner than later I see.”

My face grew red again and my eyes shot down to the plate in front of me. “Sorry.” 

He chuckled and made his way around the counter to me. “You came home with a guy ya just met and are apologizing for checking him out? You’re fucking adorable.” 

He nudged my chin so that I was forced to make eye contact with him and he kissed me. Without hesitation, my hands slid down his chest and to the waistband of his gray sweatpants. 

“Careful there, doll. I might never let ya leave.” He smirked against my lips. 

I shrugged and pulled him closer to me. “Wouldn’t be complaining.” 

Before I could respond, he scooped me up and carried me over to the couch. “You got a control thing, don’t you?” I asked as he plopped down with me in his lap. 

“How could you tell?” He smirked and ran a hand through my messy hair. 

“The whole not letting me walk thing. Don’t get me wrong, it’s kinda sexy.” I planted a kiss on his neck. “I was just clarifying.” 

Before anything could escalate further, I heard my phone ringing. “Shit!” 

“What’s wrong?” Negan grunted, palming his erection through his pants. 

“I just disappeared on my friend last night. She’s probably worried sick.” I mumbled as I ran into the bedroom I woke up in. “Fuck.” 

“Don’t tell me you’re ditching me, doll.” He asked from the doorway. “Not when all the funs just starting.” 

“I’m sorry to be such a cockblock.” I mumbled as I texted Sherry back quickly. “Last one, I promise.” 

“Better be.” He smirked and tackled me onto the bed. “Cause once I start you’re not going to want me to stop.”


	10. Chapter 10

"You don't have to come." I mumbled to Negan as I watched some Saviors load Daryl into the back of one of our trucks. He can be released when we got to Alexandria and he was no longer a threat to our safety.

"Yes I do." Negan crossed his arms. I looked at him disparagingly. "Don't fuckin' look at me like that. You know why I have to go."

"Whatever." I sighed and followed Negan to his car. 

"Are you ever going to stop giving me this attitude?" he asked as we began speeding down the road. "I understand I fucked up... again but are you going to punish me forever?"

"How do you think I feel, Neg?" I sighed and looked out of the window. 

"I understand baby, I really do. But I'll do anything I can to make it up to you." he reached over and took the hand that was resting in my lap. "I mean it."

"Does that include keeping your mouth shut and letting me talk to this group?" I looked over at him seriously. "Because if that's the case then I'd be more apt to discussing it sooner rather than later."

He sighed and squeezed my hand. "Fine. But if there's even a hint that something's wrong I'm doing what I gotta do."

I took a deep breath as we pulled up to Alexandria's gates. What was I actually going to say? Did I honestly think that I was going to pull up with one of theirs and leave like nothing happened?

The gates opened as we got out of our vehicles and approached. A concerned Rick followed by a few others filed out to greet us. 

"Laila." that familiar drawl greeted me as I approached with Negan a safe but comfortable distance behind me. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Hi Rick." I smiled and gestured for my men to get Daryl. "I think we had something of yours." I watched as their faces turned from caution to relief as Daryl was brought over to them and my men filed back toward the truck he had come out of. 

"What do you want?" one of them asked, crossing her arms indignantly and looking me up and down.

"Nothing. Just righting wrongs. We're neighbors after all." I returned her attitude. 

"Thank you." Rick smiled at me and embraced me. This was clearly done without thinking because my crazy husband was standing behind me. "Meet me tomorrow." he whispered as he released me from the hug. 

"You're welcome." I smiled and motioned for the Saviors to get ready to go. "We'll be back in a week for our shit."

As I turned I saw Negan standing there, hands clenched around Lucille. I could tell that he was using all of his willpower to not use it on Rick after he had embraced me. 

"C'mon." I grumbled as I walked past him. I was met with a hard swat to the ass which, in other circumstances, would have turned me on immensely. 

"Yeah baby, let's go. I think we have some things to take care of." he wrapped one arm around me and shot Rick a wink over his shoulder. 

"I'm fine with you teasing the prick. Hell, I get joy out of watching him squirm, but I learned my lesson Lay. You don't have to keep punishing me." Negan grunted as we got in the car. 

"I don't know what you're talking about Negan. I know the world's been gone for so long you've forgotten how to be nice to people, but that was completely innocent." I looked out of the window at the passing trees. The world had gotten prettier as it died. 

As the silence grew encompassing, Negan switched on the radio and our wedding song began to play on the scratched CD in the player. In typical Negan fashion, he took my hand and began singing obnoxiously, making me laugh just like old times. Maybe I should forgive him. After all, Amber was gone and there was no one else I thought Negan could be attracted to in the Sanctuary. Maybe it only took the world ending and for me to have an army to get him to be faithful to me. 

When we got back to the Sanctuary it was almost nighttime and the workers were winding down for the day. All was pretty quiet except for the guards in their assigned positions. 

"Leila!" Simon called when he saw Negan helping me out of the car. "How's the ankle?" 

"Fine." I shrugged and looked down at it. The pain had gone down considerably but not so much that I could put any weight on it. "What's up?"

Simon sighed and put his hands on his hips. "You know Mika Smith?" When I nodded, Simon continued. "She's having a really bad time with her baby. Doc says she can't work until she gives birth."

"So what's the problem?" I asked, getting impatient. "Give her whatever she needs until she gets better." 

"Laila!" Negan snapped at me. He didn't approve of handouts but there were exceptions that need to be made.

"Are you really going to question me?" I snapped back. When he saw that I wasn't backing down. he sighed. 

"Give her the essentials." Negan grunted and helped me up the steps. "Babe, we can't keep clashing over whose in charge." 

"Problem solved." I sighed as I plopped down on our bed. "You handle... logistics and I handle everything else. You're not a people person babe."

Negan ran his hand over his face and sighed. "Laila can we just TALK?" 

"If you wanted a trophy wife then you should have married Amber." I snapped and rolled on my side and away from him. 

Grunting deeply, Negan plopped down next to me and pulled me into his arms. "Do you remember the night we met?"

I smiled into his shirt, remembering a simpler time. "I was so drunk."

"I know, you almost barfed all over me." he laughed and ran a hand through my long hair. "I thought you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Still do." 

I felt his shoulder flex like he was trying to look down at me. "What ever possessed you to make me breakfast?"

He shrugged and pulled me closer. "I got the girl. That's pretty much all that matters." 

Without thinking, I leaned up and kissed him. Our kisses have always been filled with passion, but this one had something deeper. In that moment, there was no zombie apocalypse, there was no cheating, there was no handsome cowboy setting up secret meetings with me. In that moment, there was just us. 

"I'm never letting you go, Lay." He ran his thumb down my cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too Neg." I smiled and relaxed back into his arms. Maybe we'll be okay.


	11. Chapter 11

Before... 

Negan and I ended up spending all of my spring break together. It just kind of happened that way. Between the endless sex and carry out it was amazing I could stand up straight and didn’t weigh a thousand pounds. 

“You sure you gotta go baby?” Negan raised his eyebrows. “Could always stay a little longer.” 

I swatted his hand away as he tried to pull me closer. That was dangerous. “Negan, I have class tomorrow. And you have to go to work too.”

I had learned over the course of our week that he was a middle school PE coach and actually really loved his job. He loved pushing people to be their best. 

He shrugged and ran his tongue over the bottom of his lip. “Could just move in.” 

I laughed and gave him a kiss. “Pick me up on campus tomorrow. I get out of class at 7. Maybe you’ll get your clothes back.” 

Considering I hadn’t left his apartment in a week, I had to go home in his tee shirt and baggy sweats. “Nah. They look better on you.” He shot me a wink as he watched me descend the stairs. 

Sherry was waiting for me outside and I knew I was going to get a lecture. “Well, I’m glad to see you’re still alive.” She huffed as I slid in. 

“Oh hi, Sher. I had a fantastic break, how about you? Oh mine was nice.” I rolled my eyes and glanced up at the window I guessed was Negans. He wasn’t there and my mind immediately wandered to what he could be doing. 

“I’m just saying. You smell like sex and cigarettes. Since when do you smoke?” She started driving back toward our campus apartment. 

“I don’t. Negan does though. Kind of a turn on.” I shrugged. I used to hate people that smoked but it was something about him. Something... magnetic. I couldn’t explain it. 

“Well at least you know his name. How old is he anyways, 50? I could have never imagined when I told you to talk to him that you would disappear for a WEEK!” 

I rolled my eyes and zoned out. For once in my life I couldn’t wait 24 hours to see a guy. Where was that fierce independence and why had one guy been able to destroy that in a week?

Now.... 

“Where you going?” Simon asked as Dwight helped me into one of our trucks. 

“Negans birthdays coming up. Figured I’d get something special for him.” I mumbled through the pain in my ankle. “And you better not ruin the surprise.” 

Simon put his hands up and shrugged. “I always said he was one lucky son of a bitch. But why don’t I come with ya? Can never have too much protection.” 

“Nah. I got her.” Dwight mumbled as he hopped in the drivers seat. “Negans got something he needs you to do anyways.” 

Without waiting for a response, Dwight does through the open gates of the Sanctuary. 

“You know what you’re doing?” Dwight glanced over at me. 

“Nope.” I grumbled as we began to hit rough terrain. Rick wanted to meet in some secluded part of the woods where he was sure we wouldn’t be seen, but I don’t think he took into consideration the delicate state of my ankle. 

“Wait here.” I grumbled as we pulled up to two figures standing with their backs to us. “You’ll know if I need you.” 

Dwight glared at me but didn’t question. 

“Rick, Daryl.” I smiled as I approached them. Startled as if they didn’t hear the truck, they jolted around but relaxed to see it was just me. 

“Hey.” Rick smiled and gave me a small hug. “Good to see you alone.” 

“So uh... what did you need to talk to me about?” I asked, glancing over at Daryl who had his hand on his crossbow. 

“It’s about your husband.” Daryl mumbled from behind Rick. “If you can call ‘um that.” 

I glanced at Rick, whose expression turned to stern. “Somethings coming, Laila. Something dangerous. And we need to get you away from it.”

“Wait... what are you talking about?” I asked Rick. “What are you planning?” 

“Ya think we can trust her?” Daryl asked Rick. He was questioning authority and that was never good. 

Instead of bashing his brains out like my husband would, Rick nodded at him. “Yeah. Yeah I do.” 

“Why you even married to that piece a shit?” Daryl looked at me. “Ya obviously ain’t one of them.” 

I smiled shyly at Daryl. “We were married before. He’s always had his issues but he’s ultimately trying to look out for the good of our people. He just has the wrong way of going about it.” I turned my attention to Rick. “Please.” Slowly, I took his large calloused hand in my small one. “Please Rick.” 

He looked down at our interlocked hands. “Laila, you need to get away from him. You can come join us. We have a place for you.” 

“Rick...” I sighed. I was faced with a decision. Betray not only my husband but also my people, or stay aboard and fight until the end. “Please just give me some time. Maybe we can work something out.” 

“We ain’t working nothin out!” Daryl growled. “He killed our people. We’re trying to save ya cause Ricks sweet on ya and you saved me. Pick a damn side!” 

I looked at Rick pleadingly. “Please.” 

“I’ll do what I can.” He raised our interlocked hands and placed a kiss on mine. “But I can’t do much.” 

“Meet me same place in three days.” I gave him a small smile and hobbled back to the truck. Shit was going to hit the fan sooner than I expected. 

“Home?” Dwight asked, shifting into drive. 

“Nah, hit that adult store up the road. I’m sure Simon spilled the beans and Negan will be expecting something. Can’t let him think I’m lying to him.” 

“Isn’t that what you’re doing?” He asked. 

“Yeah. But he lies to me enough.”


	12. Chapter 12

Before.... 

I hurried out of my late lecture and to the spot I told Negan to meet me. Without fail, he stood leaning against his motorcycle. His leather jacket hung loosely from the handlebars and a cigarette out of his mouth.

“Hey sweetheart.” He smirked as I walked over to him.

“Hey.” I smiled and gave him a small kiss. “Whatcha got in mind?” 

“Your legs around my neck.” He shot me a wink as I playfully smacked him. “Well since it’s my birthday I figured you can take me out for a nice dinner. Maybe I’ll even put out.” 

I laughed as he wrapped his arms around me. “Well happy birthday. I had no idea or else I would have brought you a present.” 

“Oh baby you are my present.” He fastened the helmet on my head and helped me onto his bike. “Hold on, doll.” 

I wrapped my arms around him tightly and smiled. I was falling fast and I needed to calm down. 

Later... 

“I’m really glad your friend shoved me into my lap at the bar.” He smirked as he shoved pasta in his mouth. 

I smiled and sipped some of my red wine. “I am too. I usually don’t make quite an entrance.” 

He shrugged. “Worked for me.” After he thoroughly chewed his food he put down his fork and took my hand. “Can I ask you something?” 

“You can ask me anything.” I smiled. 

“Marry me.” He said seriously and without hesitation. 

“That uh... that wasn’t much of a question.” I stammered. I watched as he pulled a black box out of his pocket and slid it across the table. 

“I went out and got it as soon as you fucking left yesterday. I can’t fucking describe it Lay. There’s just... somethin’ about you. Something I want in my life forever.” 

Before I could respond he continued, “I’m never fucking like this. I can’t get you out of my fuckin’ head. I’m not askin’ you to give up your life baby, I just want you to be mine. Only mine.” 

Slowly, I opened the box and found a beautiful rose gold ring with a matching wedding band attached to it. 

“Without thinking Lay... just answer. Marry me.” 

“Yes.” I smiled and slid the ring on my finger. “Yeah I will.” 

The next day... 

“You did WHAT?!” Sherry dropped the dish she was washing in our apartment sink and whipped around to face me. 

“Well congrata-fuckin’-lations dollface.” Negan crossed his arms in the doorway. 

“Hi. Sherry, nice to meet you.” She didn’t look away from me. “Since it’s only been A WEEK we haven’t gotten a chance to officially meet!” 

“Okay. Well. This has been fun.” I sighed and began walking toward my room. “And thanks for actually being happy for me.” I called as I slammed the door to my room. It hadn’t even registered that I left those two out there together. 

After throwing some stuff in a bag, I came back out to Negan clenching his first and Sherry screaming. 

“So what? You’re going to abandon school and what? Go ELOPE?!” She screamed as I walked last her. 

“Let it fucking go, Sher. It’s my life.” I grumbled as I handed my bag to Negan. “I love you and I’ll call you later.”

Without waiting for a response, I followed Negan out the door and onto his bike. 

“You okay baby?” He asked, giving me a kiss on the head once we were settled.

“I’m perfect.” I smiled. “Let’s go.” 

Now... 

“Have you seen my husband?” I asked one of the Saviors as they crossed my path. 

“Yeah, he’s in the conference room.” He smiled politely. “You need any help?” 

“I’m fine, thanks.” I smiled back and made my way down the long, colorless hallway to where Negan and I usually conducted meatings with high ranking Saviors. 

“That prick touched my wife!” I heard Negan roar followed by a bang I could only imagine was his fist on the table. “He’s going to fucking pay. You don’t fucking touch what’s mine.” 

“Boss, I get it. I do.” I heard Simon reply. “He knows that Laila is in control of that situation and is playing that to his advantage. But he also took out one of our outposts and killed almost thirty of our men.” 

“Does Laila know about that?” Dwight interjected. No. No I didn’t.”

“You let me fucking handle that.” I could hear Negan’s strong footsteps pace back and forth. 

Had Dwight betrayed me or was he referring to the platonic hug from when we returned Daryl? Had this shit show gotten a lot more shitty?

“Hey Neg-“ I pushed the door open. “Oh!” I pretended to act surprised when I saw Dwight and Simon sitting at the table. “Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt.” 

“You could never interrupt baby.” Negan’s expression changed from distressed to calm. “I’d rather talk to you than these pricks anyway.” 

With a motion of his hand, Negan sent the men out of the room so that it was just us, then closed the distance between us. “Sorry I left before you woke up this mornin’. Had some shit to handle.” 

I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me. “S’okay. Happy birthday honey.” 

He smiled and kissed me. “Did you come to give me my present?” 

“I’m saving that for later.” I winked and rested my head on his chest. “I just needed this.” 

His heart rate slowed as he wrapped his arms around me tighter. “You okay doll?” 

“Yeah. I’m perfect.” I smiled and inhaled his scent. Musky and manly, just like my Negan. “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby.” He kissed my head. “So fucking much.” 

“Can I ask you a question?” I asked, sitting back on the edge of the table, taking pressure off my ankle but still making sure Negan was hugging me. 

“Anything.” His face turned troubled. 

“What’s going on with the people in Alexandria?” 

“Nothin’. I’m sending Simon on the next run. I’ve been having a... temper issue with your buddy Dick.” He furrowed his eyebrows. I knew what he was alluding to but I chose to ignore it. 

“But you’re not concocting some like master plan to destroy them?” I ran my hands down his biceps. 

“I’d let you know if I did.” He smiled and set me on the table all of the way. “You are the queen after all.” 

Smiling, I wrapped my legs around him and brought him in closer. “You have a busy day?” 

“Not unless you want me to clear my schedule.” He wiggled his eyebrows and kissed me again. 

“I just want you to take it easy for once, especially on your birthday.” 

“Well, I guess since you’re askin’.” He planted soft kisses on my neck, eleciting a soft moan from me. 

This was the most intimate we had been in months, especially since the world went to shit. In that moment, I made my decision. If this Negan was back for good there was no Rick. No deep connection, no secret meetings. Just me and my husband and our home. 

Before things could escalate, someone cleared their throat in the doorway. 

“This better fucking be important!” Negan growled and tore himself away from me, leaving my legs dangling. 

“Sorry sir...” a Savior who was lovingly (sometimes) referred to as Fat Joey mumbled from the doorway. “The group from Alexandria.... they’re at the gates...”


	13. Chapter 13

“What do you mean they’re here?!” Negan roared as we rushed down the hallway. “How in the ever loving fuck did they find us?!” 

“We underestimated that redneck.” I huffed, trying to keep up with Negan’s long and rushed strides. 

“Hey!” Negan grabbed my wrist when we reached the door. “You keep that sweet ass in here.” 

“Like hell!” I tried to pull my wrist free but there was no use. He was a lot stronger than me and he knew it. 

“You think your little boyfriend isn’t gonna put a bullet in your head just like he would mine?!” In an instant, Dwight grabbed my arm and held me in place. “You’re staying right the fuck here.” 

With a stern look, Negan slipped out of the door to the upper deck followed by Simon and four other Saviors. “Well shit!” I heard him shout in his cocky tone. “I’m sorry, I was in a meeting!” 

Before.... 

“I can’t believe we just did that.” I giggled as we pulled off of the highway somewhere in the Nevada desert. 

“I know, baby.” Negan threw down the bikes kickstand and slid off. “But that was the WORST Elvis I have ever seen.” 

“Really? Cause I thought he was a hunk...” 

“Don’t you dare say it.” He pointed a stern finger at me. 

“Of burnin’ love.” I laughed and slid off the bike. Negan began to playfully chase me but it wasn’t long until I gave up. His strong arms wrapped around my waist and held me firmly as we both caught our breath. Even after, we stood like that, my head resting on his chest. “Hey.” I smiled as one of my favorite songs came on the radio. “Dance with me.” 

“I never pictured you as a Journey fan.” He smiled softly as we began to sway to the song. 

“Never pictured you as the marrying type.” I retorted playfully.

“Tou-fucking-ché.”

After the song ended, we were still swaying, lost in the moment. For once, there was no one else, just Negan and I somewhere in the desert. 

“You know they say Nevada has like the most deadly snakes in America?” I mumbled against his chest, suddenly aware of the ground beneath me and what could be on it. 

“I ain’t ever gonna let anything happen to you.” He kissed my head and picked me up so that my bare feet were resting on his. “I love you, Laila.” 

“I love you too, Negan.” 

Now... 

“Did you tell him?!” I asked Dwight in a hushed voice. 

He answered with a head shake. “He thinks you have feelings for him because you kept him alive.” 

“We ain’t here for you!” I heard Rick’s familiar drawl shout in response. “Let Laila go and we can all leave in peace.” 

I heard Negan scoff. “And what makes you think that my smokin’ hot wife wants to go anywhere with you pricks?!” 

“Sorry about this, D.” I mumbled and elbowed him as hard as I humanly could in the ribs before slipping out of the door.

“There she is!” Negan smirked as I pushed Simon out of the way to stand by him. “I told you to fucking stay inside.” He reprimanded through his teeth. 

I looked around and saw Rick had brought the redneck, a priest, and three other people from his community, all with guns pointed and ready to fire. 

“Tell ‘em, Laila.” Rick ushered at me. 

“Tell him what?” I retorted, crossing my arms. “You shouldn’t have come here, Rick. Putting your people in danger, waisting resources? For what?” 

“For you!” Rick pleaded. “You ain’t gonna tell me you want to stay here with him? With that monster?!” 

“You better watch yourself.” I tried to reach for Negan’s hip as subtly as I could, but my ever vigilant husband grabbed my hand. 

“See that, prick?” Negan leaned back. “She just can’t keep her hands off me!” 

“I’m not leaving without her.” Rick cocked his gun. “So you send her out or we’re coming in.” 

“Oh yeah, you and your army?” Simon yelled, earning a stern look from Negan. 

“Kill them all.” Negan grumbled, pushing me inside and slipping in himself before the barrage of bullets started flying. I couldn’t tell if they were from Rick’s people or from ours on the roof. 

“What the fuck was that?!” Negan screamed at me. “They could have very easily fucking killed you!” 

Completely unconcerned with the events going on outside, he slammed his fist into the wall behind me. “Why the fuck is he even coming here for you?!” 

“Because I tried to keep the fucking peace!” I screamed back at him. “That’s why I didn’t let you kill him and why we returned Daryl. I didn’t want anyone else to die!!” 

“Boss?” Arat, one of the Saviors who was on the balcony with us, slipped in the door. She looked unharmed. 

“What?!” We both snapped, not taking our eyes off of one another. 

“They got away. They left one behind though, the boys are going to get him now.” She replied before the others slipped in the door.

“Useless!” Negan bellowed at them. “You can’t even fucking shoot those assholes?!” 

“Sorry boss.” Simon grumbled, hoping to slip by Negan unscathed because of his comment earlier. 

“Oh you better fucking be.” He finally looked away from me. “You better fucking get on those knees and hope all I do is slide my dick down your throat.” 

“Go get everyone.” I told Arat. “We need to make a plan.” She nodded and hauled ass down the hallway. 

“Did you go there?” Negan asked once the hallway was cleared. “You got somethin’ goin’ on I don’t know about? Maybe a little payback?” He crossed his arms. 

“No.” I said firmly. “When Dwight and I went out, he took me to get you a fucking birthday present.” 

“Look me in the fucking eyes, Laila!” Negan snapped. “Tell me you didn’t let that fucking prick touch you.” 

Indignantly, I pulled Negan down to my level by his collar. “He never fucking touched me.” I let him go, pushing him back a little. 

“That’s my girl.” Negan smirked humorlessly. 

“They’re waiting.” I mumbled and walked down the hallway to the platform that overhung where the workers lived. Everyone in the Sanctuary was assembled and waiting. 

“We are going to war!” Negan smirked down at the people. They looked back with stern and humorless faces. “In case you all didn’t hear, some people think they can fuck with us. And we can’t let that shit slide!” 

What have I actually done?


	14. Chapter 14

“Laila!” Dr. Carson called as I attempted to sneak past his office. He had been on my ass about getting some rest and I wasn’t in the mood to hear it right now. “I need to speak with you.”

“Can it wait, doc?” I asked, spinning around on my heel. 

When he shook his head, I huffed and followed him into his office. 

“I wasn’t kidding when I said you had to slow down, Laila.” He crossed his arms and leaned back against his exam table. 

“Yeah, well you really want my husband running this place unabided?” I asked, rolling my eyes. We knew what this place would look like if Negan wasn’t challenged. 

“You’re pregnant, Laila.” The doc blurted out, stopping me in my tracks. 

“What?” I asked, bewildered. 

“You’re pregnant. The test we ran last week? It was positive.” He ran a hand down his tired face. 

I nodded. “Keep it to yourself.”

“Laila! Your baby’s life depends on this!” He threw his hands in the air. “You’ve been trying to get pregnant for so long and now that you are you’re going to risk it?!”

“You know what they say, doc.” I turned the door handle. “You can rage war through the third trimester.”

“Laila!” Dr. Carson called as I slammed his door shut. People were depending on me and I was not about to let innocent people die. 

“Hey dollface.” My husband smiled as I met him at the end of the hallway that held the prison cells. “You okay?” 

“I’m perfect.” I smiled and kissed his cheek. “After you.” 

He shot me a wink as he bagan walking down the hall, banging Lucille on the prison cells he passed, creating a loud echo. When we finally reached the end of the hall, he nodded at the guard. Once the door was open, Negan leant against the doorframe. “Forgive me father,” he said in his cool, cocky tone. “For I have SINNED!” 

Before...

“Don’t worry, Lay,” Sherry said as she shoved a box into the back of my car. “I already told your parents that you’ve lost your freaking mind.” 

“Yeah, of course you did.” I grumbled and rolled my eyes. “You should be happy, Sher. You’ve got the place to yourself. You don’t have to sneak Dwight in and out.” 

She turned and stared at me with her mouth open, trying to come up with a response. Dwight was the loser that supplied all of the college kids with their pot. 

“Don’t worry, Sher, I know. So don’t lecture me about my life decisions.” I closed the trunk and got in the drivers seat. “Don’t forget, family dinner at 6 tomorrow.” 

Sherry crossed her arms and sighed, giving up. “Yeah.” 

The drive to my new apartment was short, only about twenty minutes away. Negan was standing against the building smoking as I pulled up. 

“There she is.” He smirked as he opened my car door. “How much shit can one girl have?” He asked, eying the car full of stuff. 

“C’mon Casanova.” I smiled, pointing to the heaviest box. “Carry my sweaters.”

I laughed as Negan grunted, struggling to pick up the box. “This isn’t just sweaters.” 

“Nope. It’s books.” I laughed and grabbed another box. “You could always take another one.” He shot me a dirty look and made his way up the steps. 

When we made our way upstairs, I saw that he had cleaned the entire apartment while I was gone. “How’d she take it?” He asked, dropping the box next to the couch and plopping down next to it. 

“How do you expect?” I mumbled, plopping down next to him. 

Negan nodded, pulling me into his lap. “Well that fuckin’ sucks.”

I shrugged and put my head on his shoulder. “That’s Sherry.” 

“I must say, this place does need a woman’s touch.” I looked around the hyper-masculine decorated apartment. 

“I know something else that needs a woman’s touch.” He smirked as his lips crashed onto mine. 

Breathlessly, I pulled away and smiled at him. “After we carry everything up!” 

Now....

“If you’re going to kill me then just do it.” The priest mumbled from where he sat in the empty, urine-reaked cell. I didn’t agree with his methods, but I had to prove my loyalty to my husband, at least until this war is over. 

“Why does everyone assume I’m just gonna kill ‘em?” Negan smirked and looked at the priest. “I just want some information.” 

“Well I don’t have any.” He spoke barely above a whisper. 

“Ya see, the problem is that I don’t believe you.” Negan ran a hand down Lucille. “And quite frankly, I don’t think Lucille here does either.” 

“Do your worst.” He still didn’t look up from his spot.

“C’mon Neg,” I put a hand on my husbands back. “If he wants to be a modern martyr then we’ll let him.” 

Negan looked at me with raised eyebrows. He knew I hated violence unless it was totally necessary. “And what exactly did you have in mind?” 

“I’ll let you come up with that one honey.” I smiled sweetly and grabbed his hand, gently pulling him out of the cell. 

After we were out of the cell and out of earshot, Negan leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. His interrogating position. “Since when do you condone violence?”

“Since his people tried to kill my husband.” I replied, looking out of a dirty window at the workers down below. “I’m the only one who gets to do that.” 

Without giving him time to respond, I walked down the steps and into what was considered to be the marketplace. 

“Laila.” One of the workers smiled at me as I approached his table. “What can I do for you today?” 

“Hey Francis.” I returned his smile as I looked at all of the things on his table. I didn’t typically come down here. I figured it would be best to let the workers and Saviors have dibs on all of the extras around here. 

“How’s she doing?” I asked, looking past her to see his wife, who had come down with some sort of flu-like illness and was not doing so well. 

“Not too good.” He sighed, shaking his head. “Not too good at all.” 

I patted him on the shoulder and handed him a bottle of aspirin and a bottle of NyQuil we had stashed in our cabinet. “Try this.” 

“Laila-“ 

“Don’t mention it.” I smiled and slid it to him. “Just let me know how she’s doing.” 

After he nodded, I made my way back upstairs and to the priests cell. We were planning on leaving for Alexandria in two days and i needed to get all of the information I could out of him. 

“Father,” I said as the cell door opened and the Savior guarding it stepped aside. 

“Laila.” He looked up at me and for the first time since our first visit to Alexandria I could see his face. “You need to get out of here.” 

“Why? What is going on?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder to make sure there was no one listening. 

“There coming back... they’re going to overrun this place with walkers... there herding them now. Please!” 

“Herding them how?” I asked, my mind starting to panic. 

“Theirs a large herd that they blended together. They’re using trucks and flares to lead it this way. Probably over a hundred of them. Laila please, you have to go.” He grabbed my hand as he begged for me to leave. “Think about the baby.” 

I forced my hand away and looked at him. “How did you know-“ 

“It doesn’t matter. Please. You’re not one of them! You don’t deserve to die!” 

“Everything okay in here?” The guard asked, popping his head in. 

“No. Give me your radio, lock the door. Don’t let him out of your sight.” I commanded as the Savior handed over his radio. “Arat, do you read me? Over.”

“Loud and clear boss! Over.” Her voice came through after a moment of static. 

“Get your men together and meet me upstairs. Now!” I tossed the radio back to the guard and ran up the steps to the space Negan used as his office. Without knocking, I swung the door open. 

He was sitting behind his desk with a map spread out in front of him. “Baby?” He asked, started by my sudden intrusion. 

“We have a problem, Neg. Big one.”


	15. Chapter 15

Before...

I woke up in our room, the sun set making shadows on the floor. My books were spread out on the bed like I had fallen asleep studying and I could smell something amazing coming from the other room. I padded silently down the hall to the kitchen where I saw Negan, his bare back turned to me while he fiddled with something on the stove. 

“Hey.” I whispered, wrapping my arms around him and placing a light kiss on his shoulder blade. 

“Hey you.” He replied, pulling me around to his side with his free arm. “I see you gettin’ a lot of work done in there.” 

I shrugged. “It’s just psych. Nothing too important.” I eyed the contents of the stove, my stomach growling as I slid onto the counter next to it. “Whatcha makin’?” 

“My world famous spaghetti.” He shot me a wink and held up the wooden spoon so I could taste the sauce. 

“That’s amazing!” I smiled as I watched him cook. In the week we’d been married he had insisted on cooking every single night. Not that I minded, he was amazing at it. 

“Glad you like it.” He pulled the strainer out from under the sink and smacked my leg gently. “I got that bottle of wine you like in the fridge.” 

“Thank you honey,” I hopped off the counter and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “But you’re not planning on getting me drunk to take advantage of me, are you?” 

Negan let out a booming laugh. “Like I have to get you drunk.” 

Now...

“What do you think?” Arat asked as we stood on the roof, looking out into the distance of dense woods. “Rocket launcher we took from those dicks in Alexandria?”

I shook my head. “Too loud, plus the smoke and fire would draw every one of those biters within a hundred mile radius.”

“We could always just block the road.” Simon suggested. “I mean, it’s not like they have the intellectual capacity to know to walk around it.” 

“A hoard the size of what the priest referred to?” I asked, crossing my arms. “We would have to block off three miles and we don’t have that kind of time.” 

“I know what we’re doing.” Negan said from behind us. “We’re going to send ten men in. Take out as many as they can, from there we set up a blockade and take them out.” 

“That’s a suicide mission!” I exclaimed at my husband. “I am not sending our people in to die, Negan.” 

“What other options do we have Lay?” He asked. “You wanna sacrifice ten or the two hundred downstairs?” 

“There’s always a better way.” I turned away from him, racking my brain for a solution. “Do we still have some of that ultra thin wire? The one that’s like 200 feet long?” 

“I do believe we do.” Simon replied, nodding slowly. 

“Do you think we can tie that to two cars somehow? Maybe take most of them down that way, then send our guys in to take care of the strays?” 

“That could actually work.” Arat nodded. “If we can get on the right side of them. If nothing else, we can break them into two groups which makes them easier to handle.”

“Alright, lets get on that.” I nodded. “And you,” I pointed at my husband. “And I are going to go figure out what to do with those assholes in Alexandria.” 

“Come get me when it’s time to roll out.” Negan nodded at Simon as he followed Arat down the hatch. 

“So,” Negan ran a hand down his face. The exhaustion of the past few days finally catching up with him. “What does my pacifist wife plan on doing to Rick and his pricks? Tea party?” 

“No.” I said, turning my back to him. “We’re going to kill them.”


	16. Chapter 16

“You sure you’re gonna go through with this?” Negan asked, shifting the gears of his sports car. Our men had successfully taken out most of the walkers and split the other ones into smaller, more manageable groups. Now that we had that issue resolved, it was time to take care of our other big issue. 

“Having some doubts in my competency?” I shot him a look. We had formulated a plan to take down Alexandria and it’s residents, but of course Negan has to take it a step further and soak all of the non-artillary weapons in the blood of walkers to ensure they turned. A step when I deemed highly unnecessary. 

“Of course not baby.” He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “You just have a soft spot for people. Don’t want you doin’ somethin’ you don’t want.” 

I looked out of the window at the passing trees. No, I didn’t want to kill the people of Alexandria, but my hands were tied. They tried to kill us and my people and they had to pay. 

“Boss, we’re all clear here, over.” Simons voice came on over the walkie talkie sitting in the cup holder between us. 

I nodded to Negan as I picked it up. “Great. Make it look like we’re here for a pickup. We’re about a hundred yards out. Over.” 

“My girl.” He shot me a wink as he stepped on the gas, gaining speed on the caravan of trucks in front of us. We had pulled every Savior except those already on guard duty in case they were planning an ambush on our home while we were out. 

As we pulled up to the open gate, something seemed off. It was more quiet than it should have been. “Somethings wrong.” 

Negan killed the engine and we got out cautiously. Alexandria was dead silent except for our men searching for the residents. 

The realization hit me like a ton of bricks as I looked at the faces of our men. “Where’s Dwight?” I asked Simon. “He’s not fucking here!” 

“That little fuckin’ shit!” Negan yelled. “He tipped them off!” He slammed his fist into the van he was standing next to. 

Before I could reply, bullets began to fly at us from all angles. Some of our men went down before they could make it to cover, but strong arms pulled me behind one of the trucks. 

“Stay down.” Simon commanded. “The bullets are coming from higher ground. Probably from the houses. Maybe the roofs.” 

“God damn it!” Negan growled, ducking behind the adjacent truck. He looked unscathed but royally pissed. “I can’t wait to bash that fuckin’ ginger pricks head in when we get home!” 

“How many of ours did they get?” I shouted at Simon over the roar of gunfire, both ours and those coming from an unknown source. 

“Be better to ask how many of ours are still standing.” Simon replied. “When should we implement plan B?”

I eyed the distance between the truck we took cover behind and the pre-cut hole in the fence the boys had cut overnight just in case. With a distraction we could slide through it and escape from there. “Now.” 

Simon nodded and flicked on the walkie talkie. “Execute!” He muttered the code word and set down the walkie. In response, one of the men waiting outside the gate shot the rocket launcher into the space separating us and them, causing an explosion big enough to flip one of our cars. 

With the distraction successfully executed, I slid through the hole and helped to pull Negan’s large frame through to the other side. 

“You okay?” He asked me, gaining his footing. He gave me the once over as relief flooded his face. 

“Not so fast.” A familiar drawl commanded followed by the sound of a safety switching off of a gun. “What’s the rush?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you all think! I’m so excited for what I have planned for Laila!


	17. Chapter 17

Before...

It was a beautiful April day. I had gotten out of my exam early and couldn't wait to go home and surprise Negan with a fancy dinner after he got off work. As I pulled up to our apartment, I could tell that something was amiss. My clock read 12:45, but his motorcycle was parked in his space. 

I slowly ascended the steps and tried to be as quiet as possible entering our space. I didn't know why I was being quiet, but my instincts were telling me to do so. 

"Negan!" I heard a voice shout from our bedroom. 

That wasn't what I think it was, no way. Slowly and carefully, I made my way to the closed door at the end of the hall. I couldn't make out the muffled noises coming from behind the door, but my mind was telling me that it was something other than the completely obvious. 

Suddenly, I swung the door open. There, in our bed, was Negan, underneath some leggy blonde I had seen at his school. I was unable to comprehend or hear his words as I rushed out of the apartment. I just couldn't believe it. 

Later...

"He's called you fifty eight times in the last four hours." Sherry noticed as my phone started to ring on the bar we sat at. 

"Not doing any good." I mumbled, taking a sip of my wine. 

"Look, you don't have to go back there." she put her hand on mine. "Dwight and I will go pick up your stuff, move it back into our place." 

Since I had moved out, Sherry moved her boyfriend in. They seemed to be fabulously happy even though she still thoroughly disapproved of Negan.

I shrugged, noticing Negan's best friend walking into the bar with a small group of men. Negan was not among them, thankfully. 

"Laila!" Simon smiled as he walked over to me. "How are you, beautiful?"

"Not so good." I smiled weakly chugging the rest of the wine in my glass and motioning the bar tender for a refill. 

"I heard." he shook his head, putting his hand on my shoulder. "If it's any consolation, he's out there going nuts looking for you."

"It's not." I snapped quickly. "You won't tell him where I am, will you?"

He shook his head. "Not if you don't want me too. Let's make him suffer."

Now...

“Well well.” Negan straightened up fully and looked around at the predicament we were in. We were surrounded by ten other Alexandrians with their guns drawn. Daryl was among them, his crossbow pointed directly at Negan. “If it isn’t Rick the prick and his gang of sorry shits.”

“That any way to be talkin’ to a man with a gun to your head?” Rick asked, taking a step closer. 

“You think you’re clever, that it?” Negan grinned, never taking his eyes off Rick. “Ambushing my men, turnin’ one of my best against me?”

“I didn’t want to kill those people.” Rick spat at him. “But if that’s what it takes to make sure you don’t kill anymore then it was worth it.” He turned his attention to me without taking the gun off Negan. “Are you okay?” 

Before I could answer, Negan chuckled darkly. “This is what this is about, Rick? Ya want my wife?”

Rick didn’t turn to Negan. Instead, he kept his eyes locked on me. “She’s not like you.”

“Well shit,” Negan spoke, regaining the cockiness in his voice. “Coulda just been a man and fought me for her.” 

“It’s not about ownership.” Rick turned his attention to my husband. “It’s about the right thing. Something you would never understand.” 

“So what?” I asked, looking at Daryl. “You’re gonna kill both of us? I mean, I’m just as guilty as he is. That would be what’s right, wouldn’t it?” 

“Shut up, Laila.” Negan growled, putting his hand protectively in front of me. 

“Nah.” Daryl mumbled, cocking his crossbow, still pointed at Negan. “Ain’t nothin’ happenin’ to you.” 

“You’re not going to hurt him?” I looked at Rick. It was more of a command than a question. I loved my husband, but I also loved the people back at the Sanctuary. I needed to stay alive for them. 

Before Rick could respond, Negan went flying forward, Dwight on top of him and pinning him to the ground. In a second, the other Alexandrians joined in, kicking and punching Negan until he was a bloody mess. 

"You fucker!" I shrieked, clawing at Dwight as Daryl attempted to separate him from me. I didn't want it to be true, but Dwight was in on it the entire time. 

"Calm down!" Daryl growled as Rick filled in the space between us."You ain't our concern right now."

"You killed our friends. Our family." One spat at Negan. "Why should we show you any mercy?"

A dark chuckle arose from Negan's limp figure on the ground. "You're not going to kill me, you bunch of pussies." 

"Shut up!" Daryl growled, throwing him to his feet. My strong husband was barely able to stand on his feet, blood coming from his nose and mouth. I couldn't say a word. 

"Go ahead." Rick nodded at the group, who began leading him back behind the fence. 

"Negan!" I screamed, as reality struck me. I would never see my husband again. I tried to run after them, but Rick grabbed me. 

"Whoa, hold on there." he tried to placate. "You know this had to be done."

"Don't you dare touch me!" I growled, throwing his hands off of me. "You want to call him a monster for what he's done? To kill him? You AMBUSHED us! You killed a hundred of my people!" 

"And what were you coming to do, Laila? Stop by for dinner?" Rick cocked his head. "We spared you because you weren't like them. Because you actually care about who lives and dies." 

"Laila," Simon came from somewhere behind me. "Baby, you know in your heart this had to happen." 

"He trusted you." I spat at him. "And what about all of the people back home?"

"I"m taking over." Dwight nodded. "We've negotiated a deal with Alexandria to help us with food if we help with labor and scavenging." His puppy eyes met mine. "Stay here, Lay. You deserve to be away from that place."

"We have the space." Rick nodded, not meeting my eyes. "You're not our prisoner, but you can be part of this community." 

I rolled my eyes. "Why would I want to be around anyone who killed my husband? Who killed all of those good men and women?"

"Do it for the baby." Dwight said, nodding at my confused expression. "Sherry told me." 

I glanced over at Rick, whose expression was neutral as he looked down at his boots. I didn't realize my pregnancy was common knowledge, but I hoped Negan didn't know before he died. 

"They've got prenatals." Simon shot my his signature smile and took my hand. "It's for the best, Laila. You know how he made you suffer."


	18. Chapter 18

Eight months. That’s how long it’s been since my husband died. I’d say it was when I lost my husband, but I lost him a long time before that. I lost that man when the world ended. 

Since that day, my community has been taken into three surrounding communities for those who wanted to leave. For the few that remain in the Sanctuary, communication is scarce. 

For me, I chose Alexandria. Not because of Rick or because Simon told me to, but it was the safest and for once I needed to not be calling the shots, especially pregnant. Most of my people followed me here and it seems to be working out, everyone contributing somehow, respecting the rules of those that took us in. 

“How you doing today, Laila?” Eugene, one of the residents asked as I waddled down the street. 

“I’m fine, thanks.” I smiled at him as I made my way to the gate. A crew had just come back from scavenging and it was my job to oversee the dispersement of what they bring back. 

“Hey.” Rick smiled and walked over to me. 

“Hey.” I smiled as he placed a light kiss on my cheek. “Find anything good?” 

“Found ya this.” Daryl grunted as he rolled a high chair over to me. “It was in a box but we took it out to haul it.” 

“Thank you.” I smiled and gave him a hug, even though I knew he hated physical intimacy. 

“Don’t thank me.” He grumbled, nodding at Rick. 

“Why don’t you go relax?” Rick asked, tilting his head. “I’m sure we can manage.” 

“You sure?” I asked, peeping around at the truck they were beginning to unload. 

“Yes, go.” Rick smiled and urged me back down the street where I came from. 

Sighing, I made my way back down the street and to the space that was converted into a nursery. 

Rick and I had gotten closer over the course of the months. I had forgiven the fact that he killed Negan and ambushed us, and he had forgiven the fact that we had come to kill him in the first place. It wasn’t like the old days where I would label him my “boyfriend”, but it was pretty close to something resembling that. We seemed to have our own little family between Rick, his kids Carl and Judith, and the little bundle I was carrying. Things were working themselves out. 

I stopped dead in my tracks when I heard Michonne around the corner. “We can’t let anyone know he’s down there.” She urged, almost silently. 

“How long are we going to keep him locked up?” Another hushed voice answered her. “He killed Glen, Abraham, and how many others? You need to make a decision, Michonne, and I think you know what that decision should be.” 

“We are keeping Negan locked up. That is the end of that.” She answered. When I heard the footsteps disperse, I rounded the corner and sat on the steps. 

Negan was alive. 

How long had Rick been keeping this from me? Why did he let me mourn my dead husband? I had so many questions and I was sure no one would give me answers.


	19. Chapter 19

“Everything okay, Laila?” Rick asked that night at dinner. 

“Yeah.” I gave him a weak smile as I fed Judith some pasta. “Everything’s great.” 

“I’m not really hungry.” Carl shot Rick a stern look as he picked at his plate. “Can I be excused?” 

“Sure.” Rick nodded, not bothering to question what was going on with his adolescent, moody son. 

When he was sure Carl was up the stairs, Rick turned his attention back to me. “Laila, I know when something’s wrong.” He got up and made his way over to me, squatting down next to my chair. “You know you can tell me anything, we’re partners here.” 

I sighed and put Judith’s plastic fork down. “Partners, Rick?” 

“Yes.” He took my hand and gave it a kiss. “Just tell me what’s goin’ on.” 

“Why don’t you tell me what’s going on?” I pulled my hand back and crossed my arms over my belly. 

“Laila, I don’t-“ He looked honestly confused. 

“I overheard Michonne talking about Negan. I know he’s alive, Rick.” I tried to keep my voice even so I didn’t scare Judith, but it was threatening to raise. 

Rick nodded, looking at the floor. “You’re right. He is.” 

“You let me believe for EIGHT MONTHS that he was dead. You let me mourn him! You saw how much pain it caused me to lose him.” I couldn’t even look at him as my hands started to shake. 

“I didn’t want anyone else to die.” Rick snapped. “Look...” he shook his head as he stood up. “I thought it would be better this way... I thought I was doing the right thing...”

“Take me to him.” I cut him off sharply. “I want to see him.” 

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea...” Rick shook his head. 

“Sorry, but you lost the priveledge of telling me what’s good for me.” I snapped, getting up and collecting the still half full dinner plates. 

“Laila... I love you. I would never do anything to hurt you.” He put his hand on my lower back gently. “Please just listen to me.” 

I sighed, knowing I should give him a chance to explain. “Fine, but I still want to see him.” 

Rick nodded and kissed my forehead. “Okay.” 

After we put Judith to bed, we sat in the living room on opposite ends of the sofa. I agreed to hear him out, but I wasn’t about to just forgive him. I was past that. 

“I was so sick of all the death. I knew we should have killed him, but is it so far fetched to believe he could change? I want to believe that he will... that he’ll serve some good. Even if he doesn’t, he doesn’t need to die. There’s been enough of that.” Rick seemed honestly upset about the deception of it all. “As far as you thinkin’ he was dead... it wasn’t a selfish motivation, Laila. I thought you deserved a chance at happiness.”

I nodded, trying to process what he was saying. “But that’s not your decision, Rick.” 

“I know that now. But I want you to know how much I love you, Laila. And I understand if you’re hurt by what I did. I get it.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry.” 

“I want to see him.” I stated plainly. My feelings for Rick hadn’t changed with the knowledge my husband was still alive, but it didn’t make me any less pissed to know he had lied to me. 

Rick nodded. “Okay.” 

Before...

Sherry and I walked out of the bar and into the cool night. We were waiting for our Uber to take us back to her place while I figured out the Negan situation. 

“Someone’s a little shitfaced.” Sherry shook her head at the man stumbling toward us. 

I ignored him as he gurgled something intelligible. “Dude, get away.” I swatted as he reached for us. “Not here for it.” 

“Dude!” Sherry squeeled as he grabbed her shoulder. She pushed him off and we stepped away from him. “What is wrong with you?!”

“Sher... I think somethings wrong with him...” I noticed his eyes were glazed over and he wasn’t talking. Instead, he was like... gurgling. 

“Get away from him.” Simon pulled us backward. “Lets go.” 

We jumped in his car as the snarling man followed us, trying to get to us through the window. 

“Haven’t you been watching the news?” He asked as he put his car into gear, speeding out of the parking lot. “Some crazy virus going around.” 

I shook my head. “I haven’t heard anything.” Looking down at my phone, I realized I had 15 more texts from Negan since I last checked. 

“Whatever this shit is, it’s causing people to turn into like cannables or something.” Simon shook his head. “You girls okay?” 

“Yeah, we’re fine.” Sherry nodded from the back seat. “You can just take us to my place.” 

“No can do, sweetheart.” Simon sped by the street that would have taken us to Sherry’s apartment. “If the virus has reached here, it means we gotta get out.” 

“Simon, what are you talking about?” I asked, trying to figure out where he was going. 

In the few hours since we had been in the bar, the town seemed to have turned into chaos. More people who looked like the guy at the bar walked the streets, some seemed to be after people trying to get in their cars or into their houses while others seemed to be wandering around aimlessly. There were fires, dead bodies, and everything else you expect to see in a show about the apocalypse. Except, this isn’t the apocalypse, this is real life even if it didn’t feel like it. 

“Negan, Dwight, and a few other people you know have boarded up the school. We’re going there to try to wait things out.” 

“It’s like there... dead but not.” Sherry observed as one lunged at the car. “Like... they aren’t comprehending they can’t get us from in here.” 

“The only thing that there saying on the radio is not to be afraid to shoot to kill. In the head. That’s the only way to stop them. Severs the brain stem or something.” Simon shook his head as we pulled into the school Negan worked at. “Now, I don’t see any of those freaks around, but you need to hustle.” 

Sherry and I nodded, grabbing each other’s hand. When the truck came to a stop, we took a deep breath and booked it to the door held open by Sherry’s boyfriend. 

“I’m so glad you’re safe.” He wrapped her in a big hug and kissed her head. 

“So how did you know?” I asked Simon as he boarded up the door. “I mean, that everyone was here?” 

Simon shrugged. “This was the plan. I didn’t realize shit hit the fan when it did, but thank God we were in the same place.” 

“Laila!” Negan’s voice echoed through the hallway. He was running up to me, a look of honest relief on his face. “Thank God.” 

“Don’t.” I put my hands up to stop him as he tried to wrap me in a hug. Pushing past him, I walked into the gymnasium adjacent to where we were. 

“Laila, baby, please.” His voice followed me. “Can you just fuckin’ talk to me?” 

“I see the little precious wife finally showed up.” A snarky voice commented from the bleachers. Turning, I saw it had come from the woman who I had caught sleeping with my husband. 

“You brought her here?!” I roared, turning to Negan. “You fucking left me out there, but you made sure your little piece of ass made it!” 

“It’s not like that!” Negan pleaded after my palm had met his face, leaving a giant red mark. 

“He had to take care of me. You obviously look like you could handle yourself.” She smirked, crossing her arms.

I began to see red. Before anyone could stop me, I was on top of her, fists flying at her pretty face. 

“Laila!” Dwight grabbed me and threw me off of her. “Calm down.” 

“Don’t you fucking dare.” I pointed at him, wiping the blood onto my jeans. I didn’t know if it was hers or mine.

“You crazy bitch!” She screamed, trying to get to her feet. I could see that her eyes were already beginning to swell shut, her nose was bleeding, and she was missing a tooth. 

“Wanna see just how fucking crazy I am?” I hissed over Dwight’s shoulder. 

“If you were going to beat the shit out of anyone, it should be Negan.” Sherry shot him a look as she wrapped her arm around my shoulder. “Let’s go get you cleaned up.”

“Laila...” Negan pleaded again. 

“Don’t.” Sherry shot as she led me into the women’s locker room. 

“What is happening?” I felt like I was in a daze as Sherry patted my bleeding knuckles with a cool rag. 

“I don’t know, but you got her good.” She mumbled, not taking her attention away from my hands. “You’ve always been scrappy.” 

I laughed, trying to hold back tears. How could my marriage and the world both fall apart on the same day? 

Now... 

Rick led me down the narrow staircase that led to the prison cell. It was in the basement of a house right around the corner from ours. I felt so stupid that he had been under my nose this entire time. Rick took care to walk in front of me, his hands protectively making sure I didn’t fall. 

“Not in the mood, asshole.” A familiar voice grumbled from inside the darkness. I could faintly make out a familiar long body laying on his side, his face to the wall. 

I froze when I heard his voice. It was like hearing a ghost. 

“Go the fuck away.” He mumbled. I knew that tone. He was trying to sleep and struggling, so he was taking it out on whoever he deemed as the thing keeping him awake. 

I looked at Rick, who nodded and waited in the doorway as I took a step toward the cell. He was giving me my space, which I appreciated. 

My voice came out barely above a whisper. I couldn’t believe this was actually happening, something I had only dreamed about for months. “Hey Neg.”


	20. Chapter 20

“Hey Neg.” 

“Bout damn time you came to see me, darlin’.” That familiar gruff voice said from the cot. He got up slowly and made his way over to the bars. 

“I... you're alive.” I stammered, shaking my head. Part of me thought Rick was lying about him being alive, that I was just seeing a ghost, but the proof came when I heard his wedding bank clink against the cool metal of the bars separating us. 

“Last time I checked.” He smirked. “It’s good to see you. I’ve missed that face.” 

I let out the breath I didn’t even know I was holding as his rough hand cupped my cheek. 

“Just as beautiful as ever.” His eyes were locked on mine. 

“Get your hands off her.” Rick commanded from the doorway. 

“Can’t give us a fuckin’ minute? I mean, she’s still my wife.” Negan growled at the interruption, still not taking his eyes off of mine. 

“Not anymore.” Rick retorted. I could hear the click of his cowboy boots on the concrete floor as he made his way over to us. 

Negan chuckled as he looked at Rick. “Since when do you speak for her? I know my wife well enough to know that little spitfire only speaks for herself.” 

“Go ‘head then,” Rick nodded at my, attempting to take my limp hand in his own. 

I shook my head. This was too much too fast. Sensing something was wrong, I felt the baby kick, causing a gasp of surprise to escape from me. It wasn’t until then that Negan noticed my giant, pregnant belly. I saw his switch flip from his normal, cocky self to absolute rage. 

“You fuckin’ touched my wife?!” He growled at Rick, attempting to grab him through the bars of his cell. Rick didn’t flinch, but instead stared at him cooly. “I’ll fuckin’ kill you!” 

“Negan.” I reached my hand towards his flailing arm and touched it softly. “Neg. It’s your baby.” 

Before....

I sat on the sink in the women’s locker room, smoking a cigarette. Sherry had gone to see Dwight after my assurance I needed to be alone for a bit. I couldn’t listen to her constant nagging right now. 

“Ya know, I could give you a detention for that.” Negan chuckled from the doorway. I didn’t look at him, but instead flicked the ashes onto the ground. “Baby.... please.”

“Please what, Negan?” I snapped, finally looking at him. “Do you have any fucking idea what you’ve done to me?” 

Suddenly, his tough hands were on my face, forcing me to look into his chocolate eyes. “I love you, Lay. I know that I fucked up but I will never ever hurt you like that again.” 

“I love you too, Neg,” I sighed. “But I can’t just forget this. I can’t just forgive you.” 

Before he could register what I said, his lips crashed on mine. “I love you.” He repeated against my lips. 

“Aw, look at the little fucking lovebirds.” That voice was like nails on a chalkboard to me. Without even looking, I knew it was the girl I had caught Negan in bed with. 

“Get the fuck out.” Negan growled, not taking his eyes off mine. 

“Huh, not what you were saying a few hours ago.” 

As the words left her mouth, I felt something inside me snap. In an instant, I was out of Negan’s grasp and over to her, my fists swinging wildly in her direction. 

When her body fell limply the ground, reality rushed back to me. I looked over at Negan, who looked cautious of what had just happened. 

“She’s not...” I shook my head and backed up against the wall. “I didn’t kill her.” I shook my head. 

“It’s okay, baby.” Negan stepped over her body and wrapped me in his strong arms as the tears began to flow. I was losing myself with the loss of the world. 

“Negan.” Simon called from outside of the closed door. “We gotta go.” 

Now... 

Rick walked out of the basement, shaking his head in either disgust or amazement. “Why did you tell him?”

“Because he’s the baby’s father.” I rolled my eyes. “Regardless of what you and I are doing here, this baby is not yours.” 

“No.” Rick shook his head. “You think he can raise a baby locked up like that?” He took a step toward me and met my eyes. “Laila, we’re a family.” 

I shook my head, exhausted and emotionally drained. “Rick...” 

“Let’s go home.” He took my hand a tugged it gently in the direction we had come from originally. “You need your rest.” 

I nodded, following him down the street. I didn’t risk a glance behind me because I knew the remanents of my past life remained back there.


	21. Chapter 21

“Father!” I called as I saw Gabriel walking with a tray of food toward the stairs leading to Negan’s prison.

“Laila!” he smiled, stopping in his tracks. “How are you?”

“I’m okay.” I nodded, slightly out of breath from the walk from the pantry. “Do you mind if I take that down?”

He took in my request, his face changing from calm to concern. “I don’t think that’s such a good idea, Laila.” 

“I appreciate your concern,” I smiled, trying my hardest to hide my growing agitation. “But my husband would never hurt me. I just need a minute.”

The priest shook his head powerlessly. “It’s not my decision, Laila. We have strict orders from Rick.” 

I shook my head and walked away from him. Gabrielle followed Rick like a puppy, and I knew I wasn’t going to get anywhere with him. I made my way down the street trying to figure out my next move. Rick was adamant about me not seeing Negan, but I was adamant about seeing him. 

“There you are.” Rick’s familiar drawl greeted as I waddled into the house we shared. “I was looking for you.”

“Why won’t you let me see Negan?” I crossed my arms and rested them on my belly. “You have no right to tell me who I can and can’t see.”

“Laila,” Rick tried to wrap his arms around me but I pulled away. 

“You’re scared.” I scoffed and shook my head. “You’re scared that I’m going to choose him over you.” 

“No,” Rick ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t want you to see him because you’re nine months pregnant and you don’t need that stress.”

“The only stress I have is you not letting me see him like I’m a child.” I shook off his attempts to placate me. “And the only way I would ever choose him over you is if you keep this up.”

He sighed and planted a kiss on my forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” I mumbled as a cramp hit me. It was more intense than a period cramp but less intense than what I thought a contraction would feel like. 

“I’m going out on a run tonight, but I should be back tomorrow. If you need anything, I have Carol coming to check on you later on.” He gave me one more kiss before slipping out the door. The sun was starting to set and I knew Carl would be home soon. Shaking all thoughts of how to get to Negan from my mind, I began to cook dinner. I would worry about that later. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I know they have to be here somewhere.” I mumbled as I rumpled through Rick’s underwear drawer. I had put on a good face for Carl at dinner, but with Rick gone for the night I needed to make my move. Just when I started to lose hope, my hand hit something metallic in the bottom of the drawer. “Typical of a man.” I mumbled as I pulled out the key. The next challenge would be sneaking over to Negan’s prison. 

Painstakingly slow, I managed to get down the steps and through the house, which was no easy task. I made my way onto the porch, trying to ignore another cramp coming over me. 

“Hey Laila!” one of my neighbors called as I waddled down the steps. “Everything okay?” 

I smiled and waved. “Yep! Just going for a walk. Baby’s keeping me up.” 

After they wished me well, I picked up the pace through the darkened community. Finally, I made my way down the steps and unfastening the door. 

“Not in the mood, prick!” Negan shouted when he heard the door shut and bolt. “It’s a little late for your bullshit.” His back was to me as he laid on his cot. 

“I’ll leave then.” I huffed through the pain of another cramp as I made my way toward the bars. 

“Baby,” He jumped up and made his way to the bars. “I’m so happy to see you.”

I smiled as another cramp hit me, forcing me to grab onto the bars for support. “I’m happy to see you too.”

“What’s wrong?” His face grew concerned as he watched me. “How long have you been having contractions?” 

“They’re not…” I took a deep breath as the wave of pain broke and I straighten up. “contractions. They’re just cramps.”

“Does anyone know you’re here?” he asked, wrapping his hand around mine. When I didn’t respond, he rubbed his hand over his face. “Shit, Lay.” 

“I’m so tired of you and Rick thinking I can’t take care of myself.” I huffed and crossed my arms. “I’m a grown woman and I don’t need anyone to take care of me.”

“That’s my job, baby.” He gave me his famous half smile. “In every sense of the word.”

I smiled and shook my head. That’s my Negan, that’s the Negan I married. That’s the Negan I love. “Can you believe you’re going to be a daddy, you old grouch?” 

He chuckled and put his hand on my belly. “I guess you gotta stop calling me that when I’m plowing you.” Taking his attention away from my belly, he shot me a wink. “You think this place allows conjugals?” 

“Consiering the warden’s been trying to get in my pants, I doubt it.” I smirked as his face dropped. 

“As soon as I get out of here, that fucker is going to be eating his dick.” His fists tightened around the bars. “You let him touch you, Lay?”

“Of course not.” I lied. Of course Rick’s touched me. My hand, my back, my core, but Negan didn’t need to know that. 

The conversation lulled as another cramp hit me. “What the fuck.” 

“How long have they been happening?” Negan asked, rubbing my back. 

“I don’t know.” I gritted my teeth. “Few hours.” Before I could lie about labor, wetness pooled on the floor beneath me. “Shit.”

Before…..

“We need to block off the stairs.” Negan shouted as he ushered Sherry and I up the steps. “That’s the only way we’re going to push them back.”

“What side are they coming from?” I asked, hustling down the hall after my husband. “We could block the steps on that side, leaving the other side for us to get out.”

Simon nodded. “She’s got a point.”

Negan nodded as he began to pull out desks from the nearest classroom. 

“Simon!” I followed him into the classroom. “Help me.” He nodded as he grabbed the giant teachers desk and walked it toward the steps. “Put this as the top. It’ll stop them, the others will just make the noise to let us know we have to go.”

Once the stairs were secure, the others began to hole up in one of the science labs. “If worse comes to worse, we can jump off the roof.” Dwight surveyed the step-like design of the building on this end. “But I think we should stay here as long as we can.”

“I need to talk to you.” Negan whispered in my ear as he led me out of the room and into the teachers lounge. He clicked the lock on the door as I looked around. I had never been to Negan’s work and it was kind of fascinating, even in this situation. “What are you looking at?” he closed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. 

“Just looking.” I mumbled, running my hand along the table.

“I think there’s something more interesting to look at.” He smirked and set me on the table. “You’re so beautiful.” I smiled as he placed a kiss on my forehead. “I’m going to get us out of here Lay. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

I nodded and ran my hand through his slicked-back hair. “I know, Neg. I know.” 

“You’re too fuckin’ good for me, Lay.” He put his forehead on mine and looked into my eyes. “I mean it.”

“Stop.” I shook my head. “I’d be dead if it wasn’t for you. We would all be.” 

“I just wish I could be better for you.”

I kissed him before he could say anything else. Yes, he fucked up. But he was still my husband and I still loved him. 

“I thought you were going to leave me, baby.” He mumbled against my lips. “Let me show you how sorry I am.” He ran his hands down my sides as I kissed him again. 

“Neg, I don’t think this is the best time.” I mumbled as he started undoing my pants. 

“I don’t care.” He smirked, knowing I was uncomfortable. “Just try to keep it down, I know how I can make you scream.”

“Neg.” I sighed as he began kissing my neck. As I adjusted my head so he could have easier access, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. “Neg, stop!” 

“What?” he questioned, obviously a little annoyed. It seemed he answered his own question when whatever it was knocked over another table. “Shit!” In a second, Negan shoved me behind him and grabbed the chair adjacent to the table. “Cock blocked by this fucking fucky stupid piece of shit!” 

I watched as Negan beat the shit out of the… whatever it was. No matter how hard Negan hit it, it wouldn’t die. That is, until he impaled its head with a broken piece of the chair. On the long list of things that annoy Negan, being interrupted during sexy time was at the top. 

“We gotta go.”


	22. Chapter 22

Negan.

"Do you want kids?" Laila's sleepy voice asked from her place on my chest. I knew this conversation was coming. We had a fuckin' great time at her parents getting bombarded with questions about plans for our future, especially considering what her mother called my "advanced age". 

"Someday." I mumbled, running a hand through her hair. "Once you're out of school." 

Suddenly there were big blue eyes looking up at me. "I'm sorry about my family."

I chuckled and kissed her head. "What did you expect?"

She sighed and put her head back down. "I don't know. Just not THAT." 

"I'm used to parents not liking me, darlin'. Besides," I kissed the top of her head, feeling her shoulders relax. "You're the only fuckin' thing that matters."

……..………

"God damnit!" I screamed, trying my damnedest to get out of the cell. Laila slid down against the wall, huffing as another contraction hit her. "It's okay baby, you're okay." 

"I can't Neg…. This isn't how it's supposed to be…" I watched her sob as she cradled her stomach. 

I watched helplessly as the love of my life, the strongest woman I knew, lay on the dirty floor falling apart. No, this isn't how it's supposed to be, but she didn't deserve this. With all my might, I rammed the door over and over, trying to drown out my wife's sobs until finally the latch fell off the door. 

For the first time in almost a year, I ran over and embraced my wife. I hadn't noticed before that she was shaking. "It's okay baby, I'm here. I'm not leaving you." I cradled her in my arms and kissed her head over and over, taking in the familiar smell of her hair. A smell I thought I'd never smell again.

"What is going on down here?" A familiar voice called from the top of the staircase. I didn't even register the sound of footsteps approaching until I heard the click of a gun. 

"No!" Laila screeched, a mixture of fear and pain.

I looked up to see some Alexandrian prick with a gun pointed square at my head. Slowly, I put my hands up and looked at them. This was their game, and if I wanted to stay with Laila I was going to have to play. "I'm not going to hurt anyone." The voice came out slow and calm, a major difference for me. "My wife is having a baby."

"Get Rick!" The prick called up the steps as he kept the gun pointed at me. "How'd you get out?"

"Morgan, please." Laila hissed through her teeth. "I need him here." 

Morgan huffed and put the gun in his holster. "You try anything and I'll kill you." 

I nodded and scooped Laila up. We hustled up and steps and two doors over to where the doctor lived. Morgan never took his eyes off me, but I didn't care. Laila was the only thing that mattered. She was the only thing that ever mattered.

"Negan!" She flailed her arm in my general direction while an IV was being inserted into her other.

"I'm here baby." I kissed her hand as I gave it a squeeze. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

"Alright honey," the doctor gave her a gentle smile as he sat down in front of where she was. "We're going to start pushing." 

I fought off the momentary anger I felt at another man eyeing up my wife's lady bits, but I pushed that aside as she squeezed so hard it almost broke my hand.

"I hate you, you mother fucker!" She screamed at me as she pushed. "You did this to me!" 

"Yes I did." I breathed as she squeezed my hand again. "And we had a lot of fun doin' it." 

After what felt like forever, the sound of crying filled the room and Laila collapsed onto the cot exhausted. 

"You did it, baby." I smiled and wrapped her in my arms, kissing her head. "I'm so proud of you." 

She rested her head on my shoulder as I stroked her hair. "I love you, Neg."

"Laila!" A familiar prickish voice said from the doorway. "I'm so sorry I wasn't here."

I fought every urge to make a comment, but I wanted to enjoy every second with her before I was locked away. We had a lot of lost time to make up for.

"It's okay." Laila mumbled, blowing him off as the baby was placed in her arms. 

"It's a boy." The Doctor smiled at us. "Why don't we all give them some time?" He looked over at Rick.

"I think we need to have a discussion here." Rick grunted through his teeth at me.

"He saved us." Laila shot him a look before nuzzling the baby. 

"Rick, I'm not here to have a fight. I wasn't trying to escape." I put the hand that wasn't wrapped around Laila up in surrender. "I had to help her." 

Rick glanced at Laila and the baby before storming out. I heard him scream to watch all exits, and then his footsteps disappeared. 

"You're a daddy," Laila smiled at me, her blue eyes sparkling. 

"Yeah, yeah I am." I smiled and kissed her. I didn't know what the future held for me, but I knew that I would die before I let anything happen to my wife and child, or was put back in that cell.


	23. Chapter 23

Laila.

The next few days were a mess. Rick was avoiding me and to that effect, so was Carl. Negan was kept in a room surrounded by armed guards until they could figure out where to put him, and on top of all of it, we had a baby to care for. 

"I need to talk to Rick." I told Michone as she held the baby, fast asleep in her arms. "I mean, did he really think he could keep Negan locked up forever?"

Michone shrugged, careful not to wake up the baby. "Do you honestly believe he wouldn't be a threat anymore?"

I paused for a second. Did I honestly believe he would be on his best behavior? No. Do I believe he'd stay in line if it meant staying with the baby and me? Maybe. "Yes." 

"What about you and Rick? I mean, weren't you guys building something?" 

I huffed, knowing damn well that she was right. I couldn't just up and leave Rick just because I found out my husband was alive, right? But what about the fact that he was the father of my child? "I just," I looked down the street to see Rick walking our way, discussing something with Daryl. "I don't know. I thought when the world ended the complication went with it, but now it just seems to be worse." 

Michone nodded, seeing the approaching men. "Maybe you should talk to him." 

I nodded as she handed me the still sleeping baby. "Thanks." 

I felt my nervousness grow as Rick approached, Michone pulling Daryl's attention somewhere else. Why was I afraid of a man I had been sharing a bed with for months?

"Hey." He nodded, leaning against the porch post. 

"Hey." I smiled nervously at him as I adjusted the baby. 

"I miss you." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, looking at the baby with a smile. "And I haven't gotten much time with this little one." 

I smiled, relaxing a little. "I miss you too." After he returned the smile, he came and sat next to me. 

"Laila," he wrapped an arm around me. "I wanted to tell you that I'm here for you, always. This baby may not be mine by blood, but hell neither is Judith. But they're mine." 

I smiled as he planted a kiss on my forehead. "I don't deserve you." 

"Don't talk like that," he pulled me into his side gently. 

"I'm serious, Rick. I don't deserve you or this place or this life." I shook my head as the baby began to stir. "And I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" He let out a breathy laugh.

"For putting you in this situation with Negan." I couldn't meet his eyes. Instead, I looked down at the baby. I needed to do what's best for him, but I didn't know what that was.

"Laila-"

"You have to keep him out, Rick." My eyes shot up to meet his. "Regardless of our relationship, you have to leave him out. I'll keep him in line. Please." 

"Laila, don't take responsibility for him." He huffed and stood up. "He's not your responsibility." 

"He's the father of my child. Please, he won't hurt anyone. He can't… he's got no one to help him. This isn't about you or me or this relationship. It's about the baby." I couldn't stop myself. 

Rick paced back and forth in front of where I sat. "Why do you want him out so bad? You were fine without him for months."

I tried to remain calm, gently bouncing the baby so he didn't cry, "because you told me he was dead. It's different. This is his child and he should be around to see him grow up." 

"Fine." Rick huffed, throwing up his hands. "If he harms a hair on anyone's head, you're both out." With that he took off into the afternoon sun, leaving me alone with the baby and the consequences.

Negan.

"You win, asshole." Rick mumbled, storming in the room that acted as my new prison. "You win. Ya got Laila and the baby." 

I smirked and crossed my arms. "They were never yours to begin with, Rick. I was just letting you borrow them." The thought of Laila with this prick pissed me off beyond belief. If it wasn't for all the people with guns around me, I'd bash his brain in. 

"Whatever." He sneered. "But you hurt anyone, take ANYTHING that doesn't belong to you, you'll be dead. Not locked in a cell, dead." 

Before I could even make a sarcastic reply, he stormed out, leaving me free. I could finally be with my wife. I could finally fuck up every one of those fuckers that betrayed me and my girl.


End file.
